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Managing thoughts of suicide & self-harm

TW: Suicide Loss

JakkindaboxCasual Contributor31 Jan 2025, 3:07 pm AEDT

TW: Suicide Loss

Hello. I am making this post in the suicide and self harm forum because other spots didn't seem relevant.

Around six months ago, I lost my long-term partner to suicide. I have been in touch with all sorts of services aimed at my issue and found them robotic and awful. A mod has purposely removed names from my post, but I'm sure you know who I mean.

Despite being over 25, I have resorted to lying about my age and calling a regular counsellor at Kids Help Line just to get free support during this period of immense grief. Shockingly, they are the most understanding and "human" out of any line I've ever called.

All this to ask..... is anyone else dealing with suicide bereavement? Have you found any services actually useful, or truly supportive? How are you coping? I barely feel like I've scratched the surface of the pain.

I feel guilty calling a line not made for me, but cannot afford a psychologist and dislike the inhuman way some crisis line workers talk to you. They are emotionless robots reading off scripts. I have no other connections or support.

3 replies

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In response to: TW: Suicide Loss

rav3nSenior Contributor31 Jan 2025, 4:12 pm AEDT

Re: TW: Suicide Loss

hey there @Jakkindabox welcome to the forums 😊

i'm so sorry to hear about your loss. it's really great to see you reach out to services for support, it takes a lot of courage to do that. it really sucks to hear that you haven't had the best experience with them. a lot of the time, it's a game of chance in terms of getting a crisis/service call-taker that you click with - and i do encourage you to reach out to those services and share your feedback so that improvements/change can be made. your voice matters heaps.

correct me if i'm wrong, but i noticed you live in Tasmania so i just wanted to link these sites to check out if you haven't already:

Grief and bereavement | Tasmanian Department of Health - you can scroll down to the 'support and counselling services' section to find more
Access Mental Health - Helpline | Tasmanian Department of Health
BeyondBlue Get support - Beyond Blue - Beyond Blue

here's also a few free support groups you can explore

hoping that there's some new services in there that you can reach out to/explore. i do feel like maybe a support group would help you feeling that 'human connection', especially because you can chat with others who are going through similar situations.

i haven't gone through the same situation as you but i do want to share this - grief can look different to everyone, there's no 'one right' way to deal with it. and it can come in waves. so please do be kind to yourself, and take your time to process your feelings. i would like to encourage you to reach out to your GP to see if they can link you with free/cheaper counselling services, or perhaps your GP can be someone to provide you some emotional support too. and now you've got the forums as well! we're hear for you, and we're sitting with you 💙

In response to: Re: TW: Suicide Loss

AppleblossomSenior Contributor11 Feb 2025, 9:21 pm AEDT

Re: TW: Suicide Loss

@Jakkindabox

Sorry for your loss…. Doesn’t cut it if that’s all there is… but I am sorry you have gone through the loss of your partner. 6 months can seem very raw. One thing I found helpful was to find a few ways to externalise the pain, grief, tears and/or sense of betrayal. Eg a photo, a gift from them, or journaling. After a while of emptying myself I eventually could allow myself to engage with Life without the weird sense of guilt. They are gone. The journey can be gradual.

Suicide is extremely devastating to experience in close relationships. Services have been pretty slow to address it. Believe me I have been looking for a long time.

I did a series of about 8 weeks where the others were also bereaved by suicide. It can be quite different depending on the relationship Eg parent child. Etc also the unique personalities and circumstances.

keep looking and if something helps. Good.

There should be more services available.

gently bentlyapple

In response to: Re: TW: Suicide Loss

S-gurung1Casual Contributor12 Feb 2025, 1:25 am AEDT

Re: TW: Suicide Loss

Hi
Sorry for your loss and I truly understand what you’re going through. I’ve my relationship ended 4 days ago and I feel helpless, the mental health I cannot control and I don’t want to live anymore. I feel you. I know stay strong is the positive thing to say but only the person who’s suffering can feel the pain.

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