Hope and Optimism

hey @GorionPax thanks for sharing this! i haven't heard of a 'forced optimistic mindset' before but sounds interesting, is it sort of like a 'fake it till you make it' mindset?

i think what helps me might be similar to the 'forced optimistic mindset' you mentioned. i've been reading 'the daily laws' and 'the daily stoics' (2 different self-help books) and they both sort of touch on this idea of how 'happiness' is a perception of things. for example, if i got a 65% on a test that i studied hard for, perhaps i see it has 'not enough' and i feel disheartened and low, while someone else might see it as 'i passed!' and be content with it.

i think it's normal to feel sad/hurt/upset when things don't go our way, but the difference is - do you let those feelings consume you? or pass through? and in my experience, letting it pass through (you can do this through journalling, just crying it out, whatever works for you - e.g. yeah it sucked that X happened, but i learnt Y from this and now it's time to work on Z) helped me move on and jump on track. also keen to hear what other people's strategies are!! really love this topic 😊

I believe that is the 'fake it till you make it' kind of mindset, but in a more controlled aspect.

I have thought of doing persona adoption as a technique even. As there are proven tests where it has improved the subjects interactions similar to "code-switching," where people adapt their language, tone, and behavior based on the social or professional context. The strategy has roots in psychology, specifically "role theory". Similar to the idea that a retail worker adopts their 'professional mindset'.

If I'm honest, there is self annoyance, as in angry at myself for the mistake I have made, due to ADHD medication, I can focus more, so I spiral more effectively, but I can also kind of separate from the thoughts thinking 'that's the old job, you're in the new one, it's okay to make mistakes' so far that has helped. Without the focus I used to become emotionally numb, which helped in a negative aspect, as I could just do the tasks albeit in a autonomous fashion, but that was years ago, I've since come further from that.

I also find audiobooks help, especially philosophers, as they tend to look at life in a different lenses, which helps me by separating from the direct issues and applying an abstract lens to it.

As another person said in that session, cutting negative people out helps, and I've slowly been able to come to grips with the idea that it is okay to not have relationships with those kinds of people. All relationships have an expiry. 🙂

I'm only now able to start slowly on trauma related experiences some 28 years after it. All things take time.