Lonely and needing distraction

@Former-Member ... how are you doing my friend? Needing an ear or a shoulder?

@Arbie_wun hello, I'm really not doing so good at the moment. How are you going?

Both would be amazing but I guess the chatting will have to suffice being that I don't have anyone physically.

@Former-Member I am doing a bit better today, had myself a little me time earlier in the day. So now I am just comfortable and not so stressed out.

What's the matter my friend? I have to admit today has had a couple of moments. My dad is better physically but he continues to be an emotional wreak even though he's old school and won't admit it.

This evening he had a few too many beers and has broken down a couple of times crying and this is good because it has allowed him to get some of his pain out. He still struggles with the death of my mother at the end of November (she had been a part of his life for 2 thirds of his time on the planet)

@Arbie_wun I'm glad your day has been a bit better. I think it's only natural to have some moments that are a little worse than others with everything that's going on.

Last night took a bad turn and things happened which I'm not proud of. But I'm still here for now so I guess that's a positive or at least that's what people keep telling me.

I'm glad your dad is doing a bit better, i can understand why he would be so emotional at the moment. I can't imagine how hard it would be losing someone that you have spent most of your life with.

@Former-Member my friend it sure is good that you are here. Remember that there are always dark days and it is always darkest before the dawn. The dawn brings new light and a fresh approach to the day ahead and sometimes we tend to get caught up in the negatives and fail to see the good and the positives.

I know recently I was stressing over the potentials and the bad outcomes, in doing so I missed seeing the good that came from it, which is my father got to see that people care and are wanting him to be ok. He is still not in a good place himself, but he seems to be slowly getting better as well.

To say the last couple days has been challenging is a bit of an understatement, I have been so tempted to contact a friend (who I said I wouldn't until I got to a set date) because things got tough, and I was struggling. The thing is I know that if I contacted them, it would undo a lot of the good that they have helped me achieve recently.

I also saw an ex-girlfriend earlier in the day, funny enough I didn't even interact with her even though I wanted to because of past trauma which was also a little triggering in the moment. I did however take a moment to think about the things my good friend said to me and that helped me move beyond this uncomfortable encounter as well.

I know that you are hurting my friend and I do wish I could help you feel better about things, a reassuring hug would be very helpful I know, unfortunately the time and distance of our great brown land can make that also highly difficult.

TW

@Arbie_wun

I know it's hard to watch your dad struggle but you are so amazing to be there for him and I hope he continues to get better and that it gets easier for you.

Seeing people from your past can always be triggering but it sounds like you handled it pretty well considering.

Hugs are nice yes but just knowing I'm not alone at the moment but having people here is just a helpful.

@Former-Member ... you sure are not alone my friend, and I hope you are feeling better. I know the darkness can feel like it never ends... but you can beat it...

@Arbie_wun thankyou. I really hope I can somehow make it through this.

@Former-Member I hope so too my friend, you are a shining light here and have helped me more than you probably know. So naturally I want to be able to help you as much as I can too.

Hey @Former-Member @Arbie_wun ,

I just want to say that I'm following this conversation closely, and it's incredible to see the amazing peer support you are providing each other.

I am not denying that things aren't hard at the moment, but I can see how connection can really keep us going.

I can see you care about each other. We all care about each other.

Hugs to you both.