jenna01Casual Contributor
I Think I Have NPD
My ex and I broke up about a month ago and were together for about a year. I would make him feel insecure about boys, then not realise it and display no empathy, only my feelings on the situation. He would slowly have reactions to scenarios where I would make him insecure, feel upset, provide little empathy or that I didn't appreciate him. These reactions would then make me feel like I had to lie to protect myself. Within the relationship, I had a few big personal problems (a parent passing away was one) arise which only in turn made me made me more selfish, inconsiderate and unaware of the damage I was causing him. He would actively try and talk to me about these issues but I was very much caught up in my problems that I would not process what he was telling me, and would continue to show little empathy to him. It was only when we broke up that I saw in full the damage I had caused because I was so caught up in my feelings and my problems. I also made the problems we were experiencing worse because I talked to my family and friends around me about the reactions he was having and not the cause of them, which in turn made everyone in my life turn against him. I do love him, and I didn't see in full the damage I was causing, but we have talked extensively about these problems and I do see what he has been saying all of this time that I ignored. I was diagnosed with BPD when I was younger, but I think as I have grown older the traits I possess have now changed. I could have BPD and NPD because I do understand how I have hurt him, but when my feelings are hurt in any way it's all I tend to think about.
