At Christmas, It’s OK If …….

It's okay if you're not okay @Macey @Former-Member

At Christmas, It's OK if....

you want to be alone @Former-Member @Macey

@Former-Member , I think this is a really powerful thread for the community at this time of the year. Do you mind if I spotlight it on the main forums landing page?

It's a gentle reminder that we all need to be kind to ourselves.

No problem at all, @tyme

I came across something a few years ago that has really helped in the ghosts of Christmas pasts... that everyone has a different kind of Christmas...

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To the Christmas Orphan

It's not easy being in your shoes, I know how hard it can be. You might be far from home or just moved to a new country, or like me, that you can't spend Christmas with your family because of what they have done, or are too dangerous to be with.

You have possibly experienced many different scenarios as a Christmas Orphan (CO) and likely looking at another one this year. You may have felt like the extra wheel, the outcast, that the person who has possibly invited you, felt sorry for you, that they didn't or don't want you to be alone at Christmas because it sounds depressing.

There are a few things I would like to share with you.

You are not alone. I know you may feel alone, all the tinsel, decorations, presents, it's hard to see them because they remind you of what you lost or don't have. People invite you to lunch or dinner and you feel like you don't belong, they don't understand you, they feel sorry for you. But you are not the only one. I for one know what it's like to be a CO, that I cry, I feel empty, that all the joy people are apparently meant to experience, you just don't feel it, and that's ok.

Spending Christmas with another's family may just remind you of what you don't have, and if it's too hard, that's ok, you don't have to spend it with other people, just because you're alone, doesn't mean you have to be lonely. I know personally, I feel more alone with others at Christmas than I do on my own, rather than seeing the family I don't have, and feeling like that outcast in amongst another family.

There is nothing wrong with doing Christmas on your own, make Christmas about fellowshipping with Jesus, or enjoying your own company.

Remember to take it easy, this may be a harder time of year, so it is important to take care of yourself, choose to do things you enjoy, be creative or do some word puzzles, start a new project or watch Christmas movies. If you need to cry, cry, if you need to be around people, go somewhere where you can, if you need someone to talk to, find someone (not always easy I know) and if you need to just be sad, that's ok too.

I know it's not easy, and whether this is your first Christmas or you have a few under your belt, remember that it's your Christmas and you can decide how you spend it.

Take it easy

@Former-Member , @tyme , @Macey

We have only the fairylights up

And my D1 invited herself to Christmas lunch at our place this year

Hi @tyme and no I like Christmas and still have my teens @home and we've our tree standing a month ago and just it's tho small festivity on the outside of things it's already a pocket size bless

@Former-Member I’m a HUGE fan of PJ days ❣️

Nice @Macey 🙂