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Nj03Contributor
Just finished up a year of therapy. I’m struggling to move on after a good connection with the therapist. I struggle with trust a lot and it was silly of me to be involved in a time limited therapeutic program. I actually regret it somewhat now. How do you just move in and reconnect with a new therapist as was suggested by previous therapist? Really struggling with it.
In response to: Bpd and attachment to therapist
tymeModerator
Honestly? @Nj03
I don't think I could. It hurt me a lot when my therapy ended. I felt self-hatred in that I allowed myself to be vulnerable to a person, only for the relationship to end.
It took a lot of work to work through that pain.
In response to: Re: Bpd and attachment to therapist
Nj03Contributor
In response to: Bpd and attachment to therapist
Louie333Senior Contributor
@Nj03
I totally get this. I saw my psychologist for 8 years, we had a great connection and worked through so much. He actually ghosted me, no explanation, during lockdowns. It felt like the most devastating abandonment and took a fair old time to grieve. However, I still hear some of the most helpful things he said to me, I value this very much.
What felt like the end of the world turned into a massive positive. I did risk beginning with another therapist. It has now been over 3 years. She has brought a whole new and very different perspective in which the healing has progressed massively. I am now grateful for the change.
I know how hard it is to trust there can be someone who else who is an equally good fit for you but I just thought I would tell you my story because there is such a silver lining after what felt like like flailing in mistrust at opening up all over again.
In response to: Re: Bpd and attachment to therapist
tymeModerator
My therapy was a bit different. I knew the end date because it was the end of the program @Nj03
Was it just that your therapist said they couldn't work with you anymore? Or was it the end of a program?
In response to: Re: Bpd and attachment to therapist
Nj03Contributor
@tyme @End of thd program. Was with spectrum. I was referred there for long term therapy by a previous therapist.he reassured me it was definitely long term. So I went into believing that. Wasn’t until I was 3-4 months in therapist told me it was for 6 months but could be extended for another 6 months. I checked out the last 3 months.
In response to: Bpd and attachment to therapist
PeppyPattiSenior Contributor
I haven't read other feedback you have here yet but
Congratulations .....don't know if this is the right word .. ...
For taking responsibility for your diagnosis.
I'v has over 20 years of very expensive therapy. 3 years ago, NDIS took over the payment as it has been proven I was owning my own mental health issues.
My therapy was spurred on with my desire for my sons to have a better life than me.
I write with this in mind.
If I was you, id'e research either free group therapy through your states carers organisation in the Government.
These group therapy are reasonably facilitated.
Or - see your GP and take advantage of free 10 councillors sessions with the option for more free or reduced prices sessions.
Or - keep on going with your own research.
You have a choice.
My mother is bpd and narcassistic. She refuses her diagnosis with dire consequences.
She emotionally and physically abused ( esp. my 2 younger brothers ) us. There are much worse stories out there.
In response to: Re: Bpd and attachment to therapist
tymeModerator
Mine was with spectrum too. I didn't 'qualify' for the 6 month treatment. I had just over 18 months. Towards the end, I was feeling very down because I knew the treatment was going to end. I had this chat with my therapist and we worked through it. I then made the decision to make the most of the last few months as opposed to throwing in the towel and making a dash to avoid the hurt. This was a huge learning in itself.
Unfortunately, loss/rejection/endings are hard. I'm hearing you. I'm also sensing that spectrum can only offer these funded programs to very few people.
In a way, I felt that the relationship with my therapist and those in the group therapy, was a microcosm of relationships in real life. When I realised this, I put in a lot more effort into the therapy.
You're not a lone @Nj03
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Help us push aside the stigma and discrimination surrounding complex mental health and change the way people talk about, and care for, mental illness.
SANE acknowledges the Traditional Owners of Country throughout Australia and recognises the continuing connection to lands, waters and communities. We pay our respect to Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander cultures; and to Elders past and present.
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