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Am Not Coping

Am Not Coping

I am really not coping at the moment but this is entirely on ME!

This is a message for a few people on here @utopia @Former-Member @Faith-and-Hope @Former-Member

that I asked could be passed on but it seems that only part of it has been and I understand from the responses that have made it through my emails that I have caused untold distress for some people. I was not going to return because of what I felt I put people through but I especially wanted @utopia and @Former-Member to know that they were not wrong at the time and I was going through a real crisis period. You both held me together for longer than I could myself until the point where my own self-destructive thoughts overwhelmed me.

The entire message that I sent to SANE is below:

I have just viewed the multitude of emails and messages sent from forum members and members of the SANE team – as well as the text and voice message left on my phone.

I have not been able to communicate with anyone since the other night as I have been recovering from what ended up being an unsuccessful attempt to end the pain.

At the time I was in a very distressed state and I did want to stop the pain and all I seemed to achieve is to cause others pain and worry and that is the last thing I wanted to do – I just wanted to end mine and say goodbye to everyone beforehand so my future absence was explained. I should have realised that the message I posted would have concerned some people but I really was not in any state to think about the repercussions for others.

I am so sorry I caused so much distress to others – that is something I will have to hopefully try and live with.

I don’t believe after the concern and anxiety I caused to so many that I will ever be able to return to the forum.

Can someone from the SANE team please explain all this to all those involved and pass on my gratitude for their compassion, concerns and kind words throughout the time I have been part of the ‘forum family’.

Thank you and sorry again for the difficult position I put everyone in.

Zoe7

I do not want any responses from any of you. I just wanted to let you know exactly what has happened and let you know how truly sorry I am for hurting people I have come to think of as friends and family, and who I really care about.

Your support, advice and compassion are what make you all the wonderful people you are.

@utopia and @Former-Member I am so sorry that the trust you placed in me has now been broken because of my actions. I also felt that we had a stronger connection, especially over the last week, and you both helped me in ways I cannot even describe or explain. I was not pulling away from you two - just wanted to pull away from myself. I couldn't cope with my own feelings and no-one or nothing was actually going to be able to stop me at the time. It's now just another failure to add to my list of failures. I really don't know what else to say to you both but to reiterate my heartfelt 'sorry'.

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In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

@Sans911 We see people talking about the importance of staying Mentally Healthy in order to function effectively in society but that is all that ever comes of it - just talk. Policies are adapted or put into place in organisations and then 'forgotten' about - nothing is actually carried through with. I consider myself to be extremely lucky to have a Principal and HR manager that have been more than supportive and have made a point of letting me know that there is no rush at all to get back to work - and when I am 'ready' they will work with me on how best to do that for me. Aside from that knowledge I have had an amazing GP and my psychiatrist is great too - just took months to get in to see anyone. If I had been able to see her much earlier I believe I would already be back at work - it has taken 10months on different meds - managed to begin with solely by my GP - and when I finally got an appointment with the psychiatrist I was so sick didn't even care - and the road has been like that on and off since.

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

@Zoe7 hearing you loud and clear there hun. And I totally agree. I work in the healthcare sector so I was a little aware of some of the issues with the provision of mh services. When we have mh parents in emergency, it can days to get them a mh bed, or they are sent home with suboptimal support. My own experiences as a patient given me a much broader picture. I could go back to my employer in the USA, but I only have one more year (you have 3 years in total from the time of your medical leave) until I need to be recovered. Sadly, I don't think that's possible. So I took agency work at home. I've worked for them many times before, and I had a good reputation. This is now being eroded by my mh issues and hospitalisations. I'm now temporarily barred until I can prove I'm a safe and competent practitioner. My employer was reimbursing my expenses, but everything stopped about a year ago. Funny how that coincided with my biggest down period. And yes, I have a very supportive, caring GP, who has walked this rocky road with me. Recovery from MI doesn't have to be difficult if the right support structures are in place.

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

ditto ditto ditto - agree with everything you wrote @Sans911

I do find it frustrating that when MH is 'disclosed' as the illness that people do take a step back (either physically or emotionally). The stigma surrounding it also has alot to do with the negative reporting of people with MH issues - and (at the risk of being totally disagreed with here) excuses being made for violent offenders BECAUSE they have a MI. That to me is a cop out and further stigmatises the illness.

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

That is great news @oceangirl. Are you going to leave Sunday?

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

@Zoe7 I think I'm going to have come visit you one day, although that's not possible in reality, and we'll sit in a Cafe and discuss these issues for hours. Everything you say I completely resonate with. And I'll buy YOU a hot chocolate.

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

I know @Sans911 we have had a couple of these conversations over the past week and it seems like we are each writing what the other is saying. You will need to jump on the same plane as @Faith-and-Hope and we could all walk along the beach ( you two can walk while I sit lol) with our hot drinks and sit for hours talking about everything and nothing!

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

@Zoe7 and Toby will have a ball too!

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Nah @Sans911 Toby doesn't play with balls - he really is more like a baby than a puppy dog lol

He will run around and play with other dogs and occassionally look back to chek I am still there - then off he goes again We can sit and laugh at him when he has his crazy minute - he runs manically in a figure 8 shape until he wears himself out and lays down (I'll try and find photo to show you!)

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

@Zoe7 you really are funny sometimes. I wonder why dogs do that thing. I wonder what their thought processes are. I like crazy, playful dogs.

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

@oceangirl I'm pleased to hear that you are getting the help you need. I really hope that this hospital admission will be a positive and healing experience.
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