Am Not Coping

I super hope the new medication helps you to sleep @Zoe7. I took a substantial (but totally safe) amount of medication to help me sleep last night and I have felt SO much better today. I so badly wish you could find the right medication that works for you. I'm super glad the psychiatrist is really hearing how tough the nights are for you. Getting someone to hear you is half the battle! I'm super hoping this is a bit of a positive turning point for you.

Night time update...

I have the extra meds and new meds to try to help with sleep tonight. They are hopefully going to help with the nightmares but I still need to get through the initial 'getting to sleep' period where the fears and anxiety rises the more I think about sleep. It is the hope that the increase in my meds will assist in getting through this by allowing me to fall asleep well before these feelings get 'out of control'.

At the moment my anxiety and fear are high but it has been a really long day with appointments and discussing some of the 'issues' that I am dealing with - and as you would expect it has been a very draining and confronting day also. it is really difficult to try to put these 'issues' out of my mind at night when they have been around all day - triggered primarily by mu psychiatrist appointment this morning then compunded by my GP app this afternoon. Both times I had to 'talk' a little about the things that I don't want to or can't talk about - and that is extremely hard to do.

I am not so much concerned if it takes a while to get to sleep because neither my GP or psych are worried about drowsiness during the day (or sleeping during the day if it is alongside sleep at night) while I get used to the new meds and new doses.

I am sounding a bit like a broken record here - but here we are again - new meds, increased dosages of others and not worrying about sleep patterns - just getting sleep.Let's hope this time there can be some marked changesand a little of that light that everyone is shining on me I will eventually be able to see.

Thankyou everyone again for all you support, compassion and for caring - it really does make a difference...

Zoe

I am hoping with the compassion and care of your doctors and us here, that you are able to start to heal. You start to feel a bit more safe. You have done nothing wrong sis. No one can hurt you now and remind yourself you are safe. You deserve happiness. @Zoe7

Thanks sis @oceangirl I am hoping my throat will be much better tomorrow too - had to talk too much today and it didn't help my voice or throat.

I hope the good vibes from the community can keep you safe. One small step at a time sis. @Zoe7

Tiny little baby steps sis I am very lucky to have so much support here and especially the support of a few really special 'friends' - who I hold very close to my heart @oceangirl

Thankyou @CheerBear I know you are always around - like so many others - you don't need to comment, a like means just as much. Yes - when I am feeling very overwhelmed I do not necessarily tag anyone in as I feel like it is not 'fair' to put people in a position that they may feel like they have to respond - and especially over the last few weeks. I know people will read if they want to (or are able to) - and just knowing that people are around and care is often enough to give me that little bit of extra strength to get through - I really do appreciate all the support - in whatever form it takes.

...and I love that my neighbour sometimes travels along the rainbow path to leave little presents and to say hi - it makes me smile everytime I see that little pink and rainbow avatar pop up

@Faith-and-Hope Have you finished your painting Hon?