Am Not Coping

That must be so tough to manage @Zoe7, especially when you get tired.

I was just thinking... should I be "mean" and give you back your advice you gave Eden regarding the evidence of 100% of days before this you did wake up in the morning 😉

It can be so hard to rationalise your way out of these thoughts though, can't it? What normally helps you get to a headspace where you feel comfortable going to bed?

It is the one morning that I nearly didn't survive that affects me though @Former-Member

When I am tired I usually fight through it so I can feel safe. I start to be unsafe when I sleep in that state and then wake up suddenly and am not 'awake' or present with reality to stay completely safe.

When I am like this I ususally wait for daylight before I can get some sleep.

Oh I see. Yes I can imagine the memories of that would keep you up at night. I think it's amazing you're able to push through the way you have been

Sounds like a good plan to wait until you feel safe to fall asleep. What kinds of things do you like to do to feel secure? Big heavy blanket and a big puppy to keep you company?

Over the last couple of months it has helped alot being on here to stay distracted and connected throughout the night. Toby is always next to me so that helps a little. I don't like being enclosed in anything i.e. a blanket - need to feel 'space' around me so I don't feel constricted or weighed down in any way!!! I can't move much as struggling with the 'feelings' affect me physically also. It certainly does get more difficult when I am exhausted to not 'give in' to the fight @Former-Member

It's great you've found a plan that works for you 🙂

Pets are the best! One of my cats seems to have ESP.. Anytime I'm upset or sick/sore she comes over and plants herself right wherever it is I'm hurting! When I had my wisdom teeth out she laid on my chest and put her paw on my cheek They are just so intuitive.

Toby sounds like a very loyal lad.

We'll get through the evening together @Zoe7

Thanks @Former-Member it's very quiet here tonight.

Toby is a sweetheart - my little shadow! He definitely knows when I am not well - he won't leave my side at all. Suffice to say he has stuck pretty close to me now for months

My cat doesn't get much of a 'look in' these days with Toby around! Poor little darling...she is gorgeous and does put Toby in his place when he gets too possessive (which is A LOT). They are pretty cute together - Toby will chase her inside when I tell him to 'find his sister' and then he will follow her up the hallway to her room (yes she does have her own room - with a safety gate stopping Toby going in!) Sometimes he lays in front of the gate and looks at her - Cat ignores him and curls up on her bed - knowing that is her area - NO DOGS ALLOWED!!!

Sorry for the late reply @Zoe.

Toby sounds gorgeous! Hahaha cats do have a wicked sense of humour though don't they? She probably thinks its wonderful lying just out of his reach but in his line of sight hahah.

What are you doing to keep yourself busy other than the Forums?

Toby and Cat are both gorgeous @Former-Member

I have Liverpool TV on - that is my main goto when I need something in the background that can't possibly trigger me or make me feel worse. I've mainly been snuggling next to Toby and trying to breathe!

Sounds like a really cozy night @Zoe7 🙂

How is the breathing going? Do you find any particular exercises helpful?

Taking air in and and letting it back out seems to work @Former-Member lol

Really just concentrating on reducing my heart rate and slowing down my breathing when my anxiety increases. Sometimes that is hard to do when my mind is in overdrive.

What have you been up to?