Am Not Coping

💚 @Zoe7

Running late this morning, but wanted to say a quick hi 👋

Have a great day Hon @Faith-and-Hope 🌹😘

@Zoe7

Last day of this module of DBT today so next week I will have a week off. I am going to cancel my GP appointment and have a complete day off from any commitments. I don't need any scripts or to necessarily talk about anything in particular so I think having that whole day to myself will be a good thing. I am literally working day to day to get through to the holidays so any little bit of relief I can get from having to do anything will be a rest day I need.

I told my pdoc about the panel and she was very proud of me - not just because I was chosen to do that but that I have been extending my little bubble that I usually live in into other avenues. The next step is to find a group or two that I can join to further extend the social relationships I am involved with. This is not something I am comfortable with at the moment - I thinnk getting back into work and this panel is enough for now - so we agreed that I would look around a little in the holidays when I have more time. Pdoc is not going to push me too much but will continue to nudge me gradually in that direction. For now I am too tired just getting through work and keeping up with the normal day to day stuff.

Need to spend some time today getting resdy for tomorrow then a little more housework and some Toby snuggles. It is good to be home today - DBT went quite quickly but I had an hour to wait for my pdoc appointment and that tired me out.

Hope everyone is having an okay day and if not that the evening is better.

@Faith-and-Hope @Appleblossom @MDT @Shaz51 @BlueBay @Teej @CheerBear @eth @Bunniekins @Sans911 @Snowie @Adge and all following along

😎🍌🍌❣️

Cool bananas @Zoe7 ...,

You are slowly but surely making headway and I am so proud of you ..... jus’ sayin’ ..... can hardly recognise you from this time last year Hon 💚

I glad they are gentle nudges. You couldn’t see last year that you would be in this place now, and through baby steps you will get more social progressively too .....

So happy for you.

It is a massive change @Faith-and-Hope This time last year I still didn't want to exist at all - so much has changed and as my pdoc said again today - it has taken a hell of a lot of hard work. Again I mentioned the wonderful support I have had - from my treating team and the forum but she wants me to at least acknowledge that I still had to do the work myself - that is harder for me to say but what I do know is I wouldn't have been able to get to this stage without all you guys here supporting and encouraging me along the way. ...and you know you have been my rock the whole time and that is something I am so very grateful for Hon I truly value our friendship and I think the biggest compliment I can give you is that I trust you - as you know how hard that is for me to do or say. I love having you in my life - I often find myself thinking 'what would F&H do' or 'what would F&H say' - that is the incredible influence you have had on me and I very much appreciate everything you have brought into my life

Yes balance is essential @MDT and I am beginning to get that with work, housework and rest. Next comes doing some of those things I enjoy like painting and other forms of art and maybe going a group or two - that will come when I am ready though and I am nowhere near ready to branch out like that yet - just getting throught the work days, DBT and appointments and trying to keep the house tidy is enough for now.

So happy and proud of how far you’ve come @Zoe7 ❤️

Awwww @Zoe7 ..... that’s gorgeous ..... but you know when I am at a crossroads, I ask myself what my mum would be saying about it ..... and often it is not about what she would actually do, it’s about things like ....

Maybe you need to stop and rest before trying to make that decision .....

Are you doing the best you can ?

Could that have been handled better .... and if so, is there a chance to revisit it, or is it a live-and-learn situation for “next time” ?

What that amounts to is more positive, or supportive self-talk .... so if that is happening for you now, consider it a gift from my mum and others in this world like her ..... and pass it on.