FORUMS

Connect with people who understand what you are going through, seek advice and surround yourself with support. We're free, anonymous, and professionally moderated 24/7.

  • 47,612Members
  • 1,358,869Posts
  • 1,400,000Visitors
Our stories

Am Not Coping

Am Not Coping

I am really not coping at the moment but this is entirely on ME!

This is a message for a few people on here @utopia @Former-Member @Faith-and-Hope @Former-Member

that I asked could be passed on but it seems that only part of it has been and I understand from the responses that have made it through my emails that I have caused untold distress for some people. I was not going to return because of what I felt I put people through but I especially wanted @utopia and @Former-Member to know that they were not wrong at the time and I was going through a real crisis period. You both held me together for longer than I could myself until the point where my own self-destructive thoughts overwhelmed me.

The entire message that I sent to SANE is below:

I have just viewed the multitude of emails and messages sent from forum members and members of the SANE team – as well as the text and voice message left on my phone.

I have not been able to communicate with anyone since the other night as I have been recovering from what ended up being an unsuccessful attempt to end the pain.

At the time I was in a very distressed state and I did want to stop the pain and all I seemed to achieve is to cause others pain and worry and that is the last thing I wanted to do – I just wanted to end mine and say goodbye to everyone beforehand so my future absence was explained. I should have realised that the message I posted would have concerned some people but I really was not in any state to think about the repercussions for others.

I am so sorry I caused so much distress to others – that is something I will have to hopefully try and live with.

I don’t believe after the concern and anxiety I caused to so many that I will ever be able to return to the forum.

Can someone from the SANE team please explain all this to all those involved and pass on my gratitude for their compassion, concerns and kind words throughout the time I have been part of the ‘forum family’.

Thank you and sorry again for the difficult position I put everyone in.

Zoe7

I do not want any responses from any of you. I just wanted to let you know exactly what has happened and let you know how truly sorry I am for hurting people I have come to think of as friends and family, and who I really care about.

Your support, advice and compassion are what make you all the wonderful people you are.

@utopia and @Former-Member I am so sorry that the trust you placed in me has now been broken because of my actions. I also felt that we had a stronger connection, especially over the last week, and you both helped me in ways I cannot even describe or explain. I was not pulling away from you two - just wanted to pull away from myself. I couldn't cope with my own feelings and no-one or nothing was actually going to be able to stop me at the time. It's now just another failure to add to my list of failures. I really don't know what else to say to you both but to reiterate my heartfelt 'sorry'.

38645 replies

33,051 - 33,060 of 38,645

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Stick with it @CheerBear You will get what you deserve in the long run - although I understand this all is a bit tricky for you right now. You have gotten through the hard part getting the funding and once this support coordinator is back you shouod know more. I have everything crossed for you that this is all done soon though.

I am heading off forum now Hon - totally exhausted and need to be up early for a super early appoitnment. It has been great catching up on some of your news and where things are at for you though.

GGoodnight CB and anyone else passing through here tonight - hope you all sleep well

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Thanks for listening to my vent @Zoe7! Hope you sleep well tonight. Night ❤

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Hey @CheerBear just read your post here from an hr ago re NDIS frustration. Did your coordinator give you a number for another contact with their organisation before they went away? They certainly should have. If you have a plan manager your psych should be able to send an invoice to them and they claim it from NDIS and pay the psych. Mine is being done this way. If you are agency managed then psych would be paid directly by them. Not sure exactly how to do it if you're self managing but I think you would get an invoice from the psych and claim it on the NDIS my place portal on myGov. In my case my psychologist knew I'd been approved for her fees in my plan (coz I told her) from the date the plan started. I paid myself out of pocket once and was reimbursed by the plan manager after she claimed it from NDIS. Since then psych has only invoiced twice, each time for several sessions, and she sends her invoice to the plan manager, who claims on NDIS. All has been paid without delay.

Don't want to hijack this thread but please do let me know if I can encourage you in any way to get the NDIS set up working as it should. If you're not up to pushing through this before your CoS gets back, I totally agree about getting a MHCP to use in the meanwhile. You might only need to use a couple of the 10 sessions it enables before CoS gets back and sorts things for you. That way you'll still have some up your sleeve if NDIS doesn't fund enough sessions to see you through til the end of your plan.

Lovely hearing about IBK CB and @Zoe7. Sooo cuuute!!

@Shaz51 hope the results from hubby's x-rays are all clear. If it's mostly muscular then maybe some physio would be a good thing. Great news to hear that he's ready to have his MI assessed - hoping he will follow through with treatment. Really saddened to hear how much weight your Mum's lost. You are so awesome supporting them both.

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Hey @Maggie
It's okay I guess. Hard though 😕

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Hey also @Shaz51 @eth @TAB @CheerBear @Snowie and others I missed

Nite to you @Zoe7

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

hope the results from hubby's x-rays are all clear. If it's mostly muscular then maybe some physio would be a good thing. Great news to hear that he's ready to have his MI assessed - hoping he will follow through with treatment. Really saddened to hear how much weight your Mum's lost. You are so awesome supporting them both.--- thank you @eth, really hope mr shaz does go ahead with it , he is anxious about change xxx

Good night @MDT, @Zoe7, @CheerBear, @eth, @TAB and hugs xx

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Hey @MDT

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Showered already and hopefully heading in the direction of bedroom soon. @Zoe7 Im surprised I’m not sore @TAB I guess I’m not as unfit as I thought.

Two classes in one day was a bit overboard for me, but I haven’t been too bad today. Actually mopped and went for a walk (small jog) after dinner, when it was a little bit cooler. It was under 30c today, so not as bad as usual. Temp up again tomorrow.

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

What about you @TAB Is everything ok? Too busy here to read far back on everyone’s news. Unless I’m tagged I find it difficult to keep up. I’m Not complaining though.

Just wondering if you’ve been able to make any life changing decisions re moving. Or is that a no no question?

😺🤔☕️

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Well perhaps you do 1 class a day already? @Former-Member .. anyway at my age it’s often the 2nd day when you feel it lol
33,051 - 33,060 of 38,645