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Am Not Coping

Am Not Coping

I am really not coping at the moment but this is entirely on ME!

This is a message for a few people on here @utopia @Former-Member @Faith-and-Hope @Former-Member

that I asked could be passed on but it seems that only part of it has been and I understand from the responses that have made it through my emails that I have caused untold distress for some people. I was not going to return because of what I felt I put people through but I especially wanted @utopia and @Former-Member to know that they were not wrong at the time and I was going through a real crisis period. You both held me together for longer than I could myself until the point where my own self-destructive thoughts overwhelmed me.

The entire message that I sent to SANE is below:

I have just viewed the multitude of emails and messages sent from forum members and members of the SANE team – as well as the text and voice message left on my phone.

I have not been able to communicate with anyone since the other night as I have been recovering from what ended up being an unsuccessful attempt to end the pain.

At the time I was in a very distressed state and I did want to stop the pain and all I seemed to achieve is to cause others pain and worry and that is the last thing I wanted to do – I just wanted to end mine and say goodbye to everyone beforehand so my future absence was explained. I should have realised that the message I posted would have concerned some people but I really was not in any state to think about the repercussions for others.

I am so sorry I caused so much distress to others – that is something I will have to hopefully try and live with.

I don’t believe after the concern and anxiety I caused to so many that I will ever be able to return to the forum.

Can someone from the SANE team please explain all this to all those involved and pass on my gratitude for their compassion, concerns and kind words throughout the time I have been part of the ‘forum family’.

Thank you and sorry again for the difficult position I put everyone in.

Zoe7

I do not want any responses from any of you. I just wanted to let you know exactly what has happened and let you know how truly sorry I am for hurting people I have come to think of as friends and family, and who I really care about.

Your support, advice and compassion are what make you all the wonderful people you are.

@utopia and @Former-Member I am so sorry that the trust you placed in me has now been broken because of my actions. I also felt that we had a stronger connection, especially over the last week, and you both helped me in ways I cannot even describe or explain. I was not pulling away from you two - just wanted to pull away from myself. I couldn't cope with my own feelings and no-one or nothing was actually going to be able to stop me at the time. It's now just another failure to add to my list of failures. I really don't know what else to say to you both but to reiterate my heartfelt 'sorry'.

38645 replies

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In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Like I ever do @Zoe7 ok sleep well

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Goodnight sweet @Zoe7

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Er make new habits/routines @Sam3 ? Even when I do basic stuff like basic exercise its well , not that much. Im trying things piece by piece here. And its working even tho am fighting it mentally 😬

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

good night @Sans911, @TAB

@Sam3, taking small steps back takes time, one step at a time ,one day at a time

writting a list and marking them off as you go , what you don`t do today -- do them tomorrow xxx

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

It's hard to get motivated most days for me @Sam3, but I find that planning one nice thing to do each day helps.

I volunteer a lot as well, which gets me out of the house, and out of my head for a few hours. With one of the organisation that I volunteer for I organise a walk every two weeks. It's not much, but it's much easier to walk with others.

In my day to day life, I tackle things a little at a time. I stop, have a rest, maybe a coffee or tea, and come back to it later.

I often write a do to list, but I don't feel bad if I don't get everything done. I just do the best I can do at the time. Small steps, small goals (a word I detest, so I call goals aspirations).

Right now, I'm packing to move in a few weeks. Because I'm so worried I won't get everything done, my friend suggested a schedule so I can see easily how I'm going to achieve my aims of getting it all done. Still getting to writing that schedule though 🙂

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Thanks a lot @Sans911 @Shaz51 @TAB for those suggestions. I get a bit fearful of setting “aspirations” & to do lists because I rarely achieve them all. However maybe I could start the habit of doing 1 thing I like every day then pair it with an easy task like a 5 minute walk (especially now I’m improving & can actually experience some pleasure with things like food, movies, & reading ...yes all sedentary!). @TAB do you not set a particular time to exercise but just ensure it happens at some point during the day (I honestly think I might be constitutionally incapable of keeping a routine despite knowing its a powerful antidote. Either that or the medication dulls me so I’m devoid of motivation). Thanks again & Sleep well

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Yes re time of day re exercise @Sam3 but I may or may not be asleep at said time. Forced self to go at hotter sweatier times recently. Well I do 60 mins on good day re walk 30 on in between and 0 on bad. After seeing/hearing something yest realised I don’t really exercise at All. Ie. no . Moderate. No well, intense I guess. Time for change

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

I agree with other here @Sam3 - doing small things and writing lists are what I have done to get back into things. I puched myself each week to get to the pool twice a week and even on those days I didn't have much energy or motivation just getting to the pool was an achievement. Even if I didn't do all my exercises whilst I was there didn't matter as much on those difficult days as much as actually getting out of the house and getting there. This is something that has fallen by the wayside over the christmas break as the pool I go to has been closed (or only open for a couple of hours a day) - so waiting for it to be open normal times again to be able to go again.

Some days it is okay to have complete rest days but that does become problemmatic when those days continue to increase. That is when having a list of things that need to be done and pushing yourself to do at least one thing on your list is a good idea.

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Gday @TAB @Zoe7 @Sam3

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Hi @MDT Just heading out to my next appointment but will be back later today - hope you are having a goos day buddy

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