Am Not Coping

Yes @Zoe7

With everything the principal has thrown at you you found you still love teaching - you found the passion you thought had gone forever is not just still there - it's strong

You have held your head up and you are proud of the person you have become

This is really gold - really fantastic - I am so proud of you - so proud of your example

Dec

Thanks @Owlunar

@Faith-and-Hope @Sans911 @TheVorticon @Teej @CheerBear @Snowie @Shaz51 @Appleblossom and all passing through...

I went on the great poster hunt today but they aren't to be found anywhere The school attendant is going to look in the remaining classrooms tonight but I am not excepting them to be found now - it is super disappointing and does make me quite angry - I can't understand how they could have vanished into thin air without someone knowing about it. The principal did send out an email on my behalf so hoping someone knows something but not holding my breath!

I rang HR and they still have no news so it won't be until at least the middle of January at the earliest. Not holding my breath there either but there is nothing I can do about it until it is sorted out their end.

The principal had a quiet word to me today before I left ... she gave me a christmas present (who would have thunk that ) and thanked me for being so flexible while I have been there this term and then said I had amazing resilience - if only she knew hey ...she has no idea lol There may be a softer side to her after all but it still doesn't excuse the way I was treated when I first went back - she needs to learn more about MI and not just think that she knows best from rumours that are no longer reality.

I am home now snuggled on the couch - I am very tired so resting up before I go in for the day tomorrow. Hopefully everything will be wrapped up soon after lunch and I can be home early.

I am shopping with my Dad early Saturday morning but I have finsihed all my shopping bar one present. I don't have any idea yet what to get for this person and am waiting for suggestions ...it is for my sister's partner's mum and I don't know her apart from the occasional visit so I very much need help to know what she likes. Here's hoping I hear something before Saturday or I may not have anything at all

Going to wrap presents and get a few things cleared up this afternoon then rest up before tomorrow. Hope everyone is doing okay and as usual I hope there is at least a glimmer of light in your lives

Not great news about the posters hun

So pleased that everything else is working out for you hun. Snuggled up on the couch, no doubt with Toby, sounds like a perfect afternoon @Zoe7

No it is a real bummer about the posters - I could not put a price on how much they actually cost me but there were hundreds there so it would be hundreds if not over a thousand dollars all up- some I will never be able to replace and others I won't be able to afford if I am not working as much. @Snowie I have to weigh up other things though - such as my overall health and my fur babies - they are what are really important to me and I have all of those so as we know life could be (and has been) so much worse.

I have sorted the christmas presents into bags - need one more bigger one but can get that tomorrow. Just some sorting out and cleaning up of school stuff to go but no rush on that front. Then there is the usual housework that can also wait. I'll get through christmas and think about all that afterwards - more important I support my sister in getting everything prepared for Christmas day and take a bit of pressure off her - this is why I like having it at my place - less stress from everyone else!

@Faith-and-Hope I see you have joined us too Hon

@Snowie How are you travelling? Any further progress with the current meds?

it's a shame to see all them go to waste, hoping they turn up somewhere hon.

Sounds like you have xmas sorted. Least if it isn't at your house then you can decide when you have had enough and go home.

I am travelling ok @Zoe7. My meds were increased but it hasn't changed how I am feeling. Anxiety is still an issue, so just have to ride with those waves atm.

Oh dear @Snowie I was expecting you to say that but really hoping you had some improvement. Riding the waves is super hard Hon. I hope that your pdoc can see how tough this is still for you and help you out. How long until you see him again?

@Zoe7I see him again in about 2 weeks so am hoping for some more answers then. I feel like taking myself of this med but not sure what the outcome of that would be either. So for now it is just another waiting game.

We should make our own boardgame called the waiting game @Snowie - we would make a fortune just by selling it to those here lol

I hope he has some answers for you. We added in another one when there was some change but not much and that helped enormously. Right now I still feel like a walking pharmacy but it is a mix that is right for me. At present I have 2 different meds in the morning and 5 at night. Altogether they have helped me to stabilise and get sleep at night whilst reducing to nearly nothing now the nightmares and fears at night. I know some people don't like meds but I can say I wouldn't be here without them and they have given me back some life.

A boardgame called the Waiting game would certainly be useful. Think I would be stuck on the round about @Zoe7, lol

Am super glad your meds have stablised you hon to get back some of your life. I am similar to you that I take 2 different types in the morning and 4 at night. It is one of the morning ones which I am having the problem with. I hope he has some answers for me too.

I was the opposite to you - my morning meds were working but my night meds weren't but that one extra certainly helped with the nightime fears and helping me settle without flashbacks and subsequently the nightmares have nearly gone. There is the odd unsettling dream here and there but I no longer wake with so much fear that I become unsafe - that is a huge improvement. I hope he can help with the daytime meds - you need a break @Snowie - you have been suffering for way too long! You know that I know what that is like and I hope it ends for you soon.

How are the kids and Izzy - are you still supervising the escape artist in the yard?