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Am Not Coping

Am Not Coping

I am really not coping at the moment but this is entirely on ME!

This is a message for a few people on here @utopia @Former-Member @Faith-and-Hope @Former-Member

that I asked could be passed on but it seems that only part of it has been and I understand from the responses that have made it through my emails that I have caused untold distress for some people. I was not going to return because of what I felt I put people through but I especially wanted @utopia and @Former-Member to know that they were not wrong at the time and I was going through a real crisis period. You both held me together for longer than I could myself until the point where my own self-destructive thoughts overwhelmed me.

The entire message that I sent to SANE is below:

I have just viewed the multitude of emails and messages sent from forum members and members of the SANE team – as well as the text and voice message left on my phone.

I have not been able to communicate with anyone since the other night as I have been recovering from what ended up being an unsuccessful attempt to end the pain.

At the time I was in a very distressed state and I did want to stop the pain and all I seemed to achieve is to cause others pain and worry and that is the last thing I wanted to do – I just wanted to end mine and say goodbye to everyone beforehand so my future absence was explained. I should have realised that the message I posted would have concerned some people but I really was not in any state to think about the repercussions for others.

I am so sorry I caused so much distress to others – that is something I will have to hopefully try and live with.

I don’t believe after the concern and anxiety I caused to so many that I will ever be able to return to the forum.

Can someone from the SANE team please explain all this to all those involved and pass on my gratitude for their compassion, concerns and kind words throughout the time I have been part of the ‘forum family’.

Thank you and sorry again for the difficult position I put everyone in.

Zoe7

I do not want any responses from any of you. I just wanted to let you know exactly what has happened and let you know how truly sorry I am for hurting people I have come to think of as friends and family, and who I really care about.

Your support, advice and compassion are what make you all the wonderful people you are.

@utopia and @Former-Member I am so sorry that the trust you placed in me has now been broken because of my actions. I also felt that we had a stronger connection, especially over the last week, and you both helped me in ways I cannot even describe or explain. I was not pulling away from you two - just wanted to pull away from myself. I couldn't cope with my own feelings and no-one or nothing was actually going to be able to stop me at the time. It's now just another failure to add to my list of failures. I really don't know what else to say to you both but to reiterate my heartfelt 'sorry'.

38645 replies

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In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Goodmorning everyone @Former-Member @Phoenix_Rising @utopia @Zoe7 @Faith-and-Hope @Appleblossom @Pepsimax
Hope you guys slept well and you have a great day 💚💙💜❤💕

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

And thank you for staying up with me last night too 💙💚💖

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Hope you slept well @Zoe7 and today is a good day for you 💚

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

@Zoe7, @utopia, Good morning and how are you both today.

The two of you are an absolut crackup.

@Phoenix_Rising, I am with you, staying in the corner. no way could I even think of keeping up with @Zoe7 & @utopia.

@Former-Member, Great news about your husband.

@BlueBay, How are you today? Hope you had good rest.

@Former-Member, Thank for the laughs

@Former-Member, So glad to see you there last night.

To all, I was at work and notifcations started going off. Read approx 50+ at work. By the time I got home, had dinner, there were another 50-60 notifications of my phone.

Woke up this morning to 181, what a crack up. Made my morning to sit there read them and laugh my head off. Thank you all.

Love you all.

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

@Zoe7, How are you going today, was concerned about you yesterday. So happy you were able to put you plan into place and still show up last night.

Very brave of you and good on you.

Love ya, Hugs

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Hi @Heart

After a terrible negative night and with the help of beautiful friend @Zoe7 I managed to sleep.

Hope you have a nice day 🙂

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

@BlueBay @Heart @Former-Member @Former-Member @utopia @Faith-and-Hope @Appleblossom @Shaz51 @Pepsimax @Former-Member @Phoenix_Rising (I know I have forgotten someone...)

Thankyou for your concern and kind words yesterday. I was feeling quite distressed and not in a very good state but I did manage to get through. The distraction and fun last night certainly helped

I did not sleep well and am very tired this morning but the sun is out and I am here - so too positives already!!!

I am going to just take today one minute and one hour at a time - now pressure on myself and no plans that I can't achieve (or fail to achieve).

I do truly hope that everyone has a day filled with light and that some of that light also shines on me today. I am do great but I am ok - baby steps and just breathing today for me everyone

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Good idea @Zoe7
We are all here with you too. Lots of hugs 💪 💜💗

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

@Zoe7, None of us fail, we just don't quite get there in the way we would like. Last night was so so funny, sorry I couldn't get there, but had fun reading it this morning.

Please be gentle with yourself today and just flutter around slowly. We will be here to keep you flying.

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

@Former-Member I do know you understand and can feel for what I am dealing with - as difficult as that is there is some consolation that others do understand what I am going through. 'Waking up' to feel I can't breathe, the anxiety and pain is everywhere yet I am so numb at the same time - this is so incredibly tough to deal with. What makes it so much harder is that I can't move until I actually start 'feeling' again and that makes it even tougher - this is when I want it to all stop and am in the most danger to myself.

Toby sleeps on the bed with me and he knows when I am in distress. He sits right on top of me which actually does two things - first it adds to the pressure I feel in my chest but then it helps to gain enough strength to reach out and touch him. Small things - small comfort.

My meds help me to sleep when I am not feeling really distressed beforehand. When the feelings are becoming too overwhelming I really fight the tiredness so I don't sleep as I know the flashbacks and then the nightmares are going to be quite bad. I used to have the nightmares every night - not so much now. There will be a day or two where I have had some not-so-nice dreams but not the intensity of the other nights. The severity and regularity of the flashbacks and nighytmares have increasd dramatically since I started 'tackling' the causes - have stopped those sessions for now because of how much they were affecting me throughout each day. So for now it is mainly only the distress at nights I have to deal with.

There is so much for me to have to 'unlock' and work through that I know it is going to be a long and hard road - and I need to be able to do it at my own pace - I know this because trying to push forward too quickly has been just too hard and has really taken it's toll on me. I want to be able to 'live' sometimes and not feel the weight of expectaions and my past constantly on my shoulders - so baby steps and sesrching for some light in each day has become my new focus.

I really appreciate you taking the time to listen and respond when you have @Former-Member because I know you are dealing with so much yorself at the moment. I find that giving to others helps me to be more at peace with my own demons and if that is also the case for you then you must be feeling quite at peace You are an amazing women and a wonderful friend - and your support and guidance is highly valued.

Love you @Former-Member

Zoe

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