Am Not Coping

Goodnight sweet butterfly ...... @Zoe7

It seems like you have a full day planned today @Faith-and-Hope I hope you manage to get to the pool in amongst getting your nils done and your visual diary work.

I need to get organised for DBT soon but will keep my eye out for you across the day. A little F&H always gives me a lift when I see you here

Morning @Zoe7 ......

Late start for me this morning because it was a late finish, but that's okay. I was looking for a place last night where I could leave my work with a major problem solved, rather than trying to sleep on it, and my commitments today are loose enough that I could sleep in this morning.

"Sleep in" is a misnomer really .... more like "ënough sleep for now".

So, the pool is still a maybe, and moved to a different time slot at that, because I need to re-do some of my photos for the assignment, and that will fit nicely with coffee and something to eat ahead of getting these nails done. They are complaining as I type, so it's clear I couldn't have gone far past today in getting them done, and it's studio work again tomorrow, which is just begging to lose a nail .....

I will be looking for you too Hon ..... You have probably left for DBT by now. I hope it goes well today.

I hope your day is going as planned for you @Faith-and-Hope - nails done and hopefully a pool session thrown in there too.

@CheerBear @outlander @Shaz51 @frog @Teej @Sans911 @Snowie @MDT @Owlunar @BlueBay and all who pass through here...

DBT was a bit harder today - I couldn't concentrate - have been like that since Friday night. Instead of talking today I said I had had a shite week and that I wasn't able to say much today - that went over ok which was good because I think I would have burst into tears today if I had to say anything more than I did.

Pdoc appointment went a bit longer than usual - talked to her about loss and how much it is affecting me and although I can't change it I feel like I am not dealing with it either...

We also talked about the meeting I had with the Principal and contacting HR - both are very positive things but are being overshadowed at the moment by the sadness I am feeling. Need to find ways to deal with these emotions rather than my default being SI.

I have also heard back from HR and discussed this with my pdoc. The next step is to get a letter from my GP for work stating what I can /am capable of doing in regards to work arrangements - time frames, days etc,

Still feeling pretty lost today but having some things moving forward is helping - the next 2 days will be hard - I know that - but I will get through them somehow and no doubt be able to move on in time.

Wtg @Zoe7 ..... you are getting there, step by step .....

I am glad you spoke up about how you were feeling in the group session, and could just sit in without really contributing today. That was a major achievement too. So well done. You were respecting how you were feeling and stating your boundaries, but still able to stay and listen.

Today was the first time for a long time that I didn't want to be there @Faith-and-Hope I wasn't coping with not being able to concentrate and felt very much like leaving in the break - but I stuck it out and made it through. I know these are all small steps in the longer journey and I am getting there but some days it is so much harder than others.

Did you manage to get to the pool today?

way to go @Zoe7

Hello @Faith-and-Hope

Haven't got to the pool yet @Zoe7. That's the plan for later this afternoon, although I prefer mornings.

I did a re-shoot of some of my photography this morning and have learned how to load the images ..... yay ..... so now I am editing them for the Word docs that contain the support material for the assignment, so working to my anticipated schedule so far ..... the pool will be my down-time, and like a bit of a reward if I can achieve all these support docs by the end of the afternoon. It's all coming together nicely at the moment.

So pleased you persevered with the group. You will gain strength in doing that progressively, so you are right, it's all part of the bigger, long-term picture.

Hi @Shaz51 ....

I hope you're feeling a little better Hon .....

feeling tired @Faith-and-Hope

busy day , did one 2 hour cleaning job , had to take mum to hospital for blood tests

saw the Podiatrist this morning

cleaned mum`s house and mum does not feel good today

then diabetes australia rang me

then Kidney health australia rang me

having a coffee now

hope you are having a ok day

'Learnt how to load the images' - yea for you Hon - that will certainly help you moving forward - you are learning progressively also as you go and that is inspiring to me - helps me keep on track (as much as I can) by finding out what you are doing and the excitement and progress you are displaying with your studies.

I am feeling really flat this afternoon but trying to stay awake and distracted - doing little bits of housework ...putting things away bit by bit and generally tidying up - it is better than nothing!

Going to try for an early night tonight - methinks it won't be too much of an ask seeing how tired I presently am - and last night was relatively late for me ...not as late as you though @Faith-and-Hope Glad you got some work done though and had this morning to 'sleep in'.