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Am Not Coping

Am Not Coping

I am really not coping at the moment but this is entirely on ME!

This is a message for a few people on here @utopia @Former-Member @Faith-and-Hope @Former-Member

that I asked could be passed on but it seems that only part of it has been and I understand from the responses that have made it through my emails that I have caused untold distress for some people. I was not going to return because of what I felt I put people through but I especially wanted @utopia and @Former-Member to know that they were not wrong at the time and I was going through a real crisis period. You both held me together for longer than I could myself until the point where my own self-destructive thoughts overwhelmed me.

The entire message that I sent to SANE is below:

I have just viewed the multitude of emails and messages sent from forum members and members of the SANE team – as well as the text and voice message left on my phone.

I have not been able to communicate with anyone since the other night as I have been recovering from what ended up being an unsuccessful attempt to end the pain.

At the time I was in a very distressed state and I did want to stop the pain and all I seemed to achieve is to cause others pain and worry and that is the last thing I wanted to do – I just wanted to end mine and say goodbye to everyone beforehand so my future absence was explained. I should have realised that the message I posted would have concerned some people but I really was not in any state to think about the repercussions for others.

I am so sorry I caused so much distress to others – that is something I will have to hopefully try and live with.

I don’t believe after the concern and anxiety I caused to so many that I will ever be able to return to the forum.

Can someone from the SANE team please explain all this to all those involved and pass on my gratitude for their compassion, concerns and kind words throughout the time I have been part of the ‘forum family’.

Thank you and sorry again for the difficult position I put everyone in.

Zoe7

I do not want any responses from any of you. I just wanted to let you know exactly what has happened and let you know how truly sorry I am for hurting people I have come to think of as friends and family, and who I really care about.

Your support, advice and compassion are what make you all the wonderful people you are.

@utopia and @Former-Member I am so sorry that the trust you placed in me has now been broken because of my actions. I also felt that we had a stronger connection, especially over the last week, and you both helped me in ways I cannot even describe or explain. I was not pulling away from you two - just wanted to pull away from myself. I couldn't cope with my own feelings and no-one or nothing was actually going to be able to stop me at the time. It's now just another failure to add to my list of failures. I really don't know what else to say to you both but to reiterate my heartfelt 'sorry'.

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In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

@Zoe7 understand how distressing fears can be. Mine are very different to yours but just as hard to budge. When you are ready you could try just starting keeping a simple journal with scales of distress and some features of them. Maybe you could help them build up a picture. I'd imagine meds wouldn't always be effective. I have one that I can count on but it does take a while to kick in and I lose about 16 hours straight and am foggy but sometimes I use it just to get through the night.

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

@Zoe7. Oops suggesting something. Sorry just read your other post. Sometimes I find it really helpful for people to suggest things but sometimes it's too hard to take in. I'm guessing you're at the too hard to even contemplate stage.

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

I'm sorry. Sometimes I get caught up with trying to fix things when I need to just listen. Listening now if you want.

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

@Former-Member No it's actually the more obvious things like music, tv etc that you would think are ok but for me are not. 'He' was an amazing singer and musician and everything on tv these days seems to have some 'issue' that I can't deal with. There is one particular song - that was on an ad for an upcoming show a while back - and now everytime I see ads I think of that song, and everytime I see anything related to that show I get anxious. (It was the last thing I heard before I went to sleep that night - and 'he' sang it to me).

No need to be sorry I am just taking too long to respond

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

@Former-Member The one thing I have in my life that is completely separated from all the other people and things that have happened is Art. My mum likes art and my sister certainly appreciates it but they don't have it as a major part of their lives. I think my mum would love to do more craft 'stuff' - and has dabbled in various things in the past - but would not have it as a main focus in her life like I do.

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

that's heartbreaking @Zoe7. It's so very unfair how these things play out in our brain. I can understand you transferring it. I haven't watched TV for 3.5 years for a similar kind of scenario. Mine is no where near as traumatic but I developed a heightened emotional state and kind of fear when watching TV. Now tv just brings amplified feelings of surreal intensity even though it's long passed. Sorry I'm talking in riddles. What happened that set me off was not trauma from something that happened to me directly and it's hard to explain but I've ended up with heightened states of emotions and fears. Music also can set me off. I walked out of tafe the other day when I wasn't doing so well after a girl played three chords on her guitar. I just couldn't help the overwhelming emotional sensitivity. I feel like I'm talking about me. Is this helping?

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Now I'm taking too long to respond 😜 @Zoe7. I'm so glad about the art. I would love to have art. What art do you enjoy the most. Do you ever go to MONA? I went a few years ago when I was there. Kind of wild and I loved it. So very different to anything I'd seen.

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

@Former-Member Are you able to talk more about your emotional sensitivities - or is that too hard for you?

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

It's not hard for me @Zoe7. I carry shame for developing them. I'm afraid I can't really talk about what my stuff is on the forum. It's a little different from anyone elses. In a round about way I was collateral damage for something, meaning I wasn't the direct victim but became like a secondary victim of something. I hope this isn't too confusing.

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

@Zoe7 It became heightened because I lived through it for a few years and one of the patterns was on a Friday night. Think I should shut up there as I'm probably digging myself in a hole and getting you confused. Sorry. I have my reasons for my ambiguity.
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