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Am Not Coping

Am Not Coping

I am really not coping at the moment but this is entirely on ME!

This is a message for a few people on here @utopia @Former-Member @Faith-and-Hope @Former-Member

that I asked could be passed on but it seems that only part of it has been and I understand from the responses that have made it through my emails that I have caused untold distress for some people. I was not going to return because of what I felt I put people through but I especially wanted @utopia and @Former-Member to know that they were not wrong at the time and I was going through a real crisis period. You both held me together for longer than I could myself until the point where my own self-destructive thoughts overwhelmed me.

The entire message that I sent to SANE is below:

I have just viewed the multitude of emails and messages sent from forum members and members of the SANE team – as well as the text and voice message left on my phone.

I have not been able to communicate with anyone since the other night as I have been recovering from what ended up being an unsuccessful attempt to end the pain.

At the time I was in a very distressed state and I did want to stop the pain and all I seemed to achieve is to cause others pain and worry and that is the last thing I wanted to do – I just wanted to end mine and say goodbye to everyone beforehand so my future absence was explained. I should have realised that the message I posted would have concerned some people but I really was not in any state to think about the repercussions for others.

I am so sorry I caused so much distress to others – that is something I will have to hopefully try and live with.

I don’t believe after the concern and anxiety I caused to so many that I will ever be able to return to the forum.

Can someone from the SANE team please explain all this to all those involved and pass on my gratitude for their compassion, concerns and kind words throughout the time I have been part of the ‘forum family’.

Thank you and sorry again for the difficult position I put everyone in.

Zoe7

I do not want any responses from any of you. I just wanted to let you know exactly what has happened and let you know how truly sorry I am for hurting people I have come to think of as friends and family, and who I really care about.

Your support, advice and compassion are what make you all the wonderful people you are.

@utopia and @Former-Member I am so sorry that the trust you placed in me has now been broken because of my actions. I also felt that we had a stronger connection, especially over the last week, and you both helped me in ways I cannot even describe or explain. I was not pulling away from you two - just wanted to pull away from myself. I couldn't cope with my own feelings and no-one or nothing was actually going to be able to stop me at the time. It's now just another failure to add to my list of failures. I really don't know what else to say to you both but to reiterate my heartfelt 'sorry'.

38645 replies

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In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Lol @Zoe7 ..... it was a behaviour pattern I had to teach myself to follow, rather than a compulsion ...... believe me, my mother did not fold tea-towels ..... this was a principle I taught her ..... 😆

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

HI @Bubbles3 i watch some tv but only certain shows. I watch movies but again only certain ones. I find there are too many triggers with a lot of shows and movies.

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

I don't watch Tv much @Bubbles3 ...... but it's almost constant with my WH ..... and his go-to family time is movies, so to join in family time is to watch movies.

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

@Bubbles3 there are a couple of other members I know of that don't have/watch tv.

I don't watch much - usually have it turned on but with the sound off - otherwise I would literally be sitting in the one spot in the dark and would not move at all. There are way too many triggers - so many programs these days seem to be very focussed on 'certain' content

Having the tv on at night (even though I am not watching anything) provides both light and movement - it is in the background but somehow comforting also.

@Faith-and-Hope I have this image now of a little girl showing her mum how to fold tea-towels (even though I know you were older, that seems alot cuter )

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

i dont watch any tv. i dont knnow why. i have a tv im my room ut i dont even watch it. i use to watch tv when the kids were very young but not anymore. im to writting or drawing or doing stuff around the house. i cant even sit down with the kids and watch tv with them. it just doesnt interest me. some time we do snuggle up in my room and watch a movie but most of the time i fall asleep because it bores me. maybe i just weird.

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Not weird at all @Bubbles3 ...... I get that "being over it" feeling too.


Hahaha @Zoe7 ..... that is soooo cute ❣️

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

i use to be like that @Zoe7

just having it on just so i could just hear it but not watch it. it helped me go to sleep. but hubby use to get p*ssed of with it. so i stopped doing that to

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

'just weird' @Bubbles3 - you are in good compay here then

I mostly watch (actually watch) sport. I used to really enjoy British Cop shows and comedies but the content is so similar with them all now - don't know whether it is 'a sign of the times' or I am just older (alot older lol) and it is more of a case of seen it all before, don't want to see it again (plus how triggering it can be )

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

My grandma had an mi @Zoe7 ...... think my mum grew up with the housework being done obsessive-compulsively one day, and being left to wrack and ruin the next ...... so she had her own "critical path" approach ..... beds only got "made" if someone turned up unexpectedly (as in thrown together) or we were expecting visitors (slightly higher standard).

I can do "critical path" but I have seen and felt what that looks like, so I try to keep the standards higher than that, but not obsessively, and not when we are ill, or injured, or managing high-stress circumstances.

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Hi @Former-Member

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