Am Not Coping

Hope all goes well today @Faith-and-Hope, will be thinking about you

Thanks for last night

💕💕💕💕💕 Nell

Good to see you here @Former-Member .... 💐💜💕. I hope you managed a little sleep. And thank you ....

Thankyou for my flowers @Faith-and-Hope - love the colours

I know you save most images I send you on your phone F&H - the one I posted for you last night is actually a lot softer and more detailed enlarged though

I love the colours too @Zoe7 ...... they are breathing strength into my heart and mind this morning.

The image of the butterfly in hands I have had in my collection to send to you ..... 🤗💕 ... and here it was this morning, waiting for me .... FC ..... 💐💕

I had an early morning call from D1 ..... she has found it hard to accept that I have made forum friends here, but she is slowly coming to accept that it is something very special to me. D3 is different .... she has sent a hello before, so I'm gonna say hello from her again. She is thrilled to know that I am cared for here as much as I am, and can share my care for others here too.

Thinking of you Zoe7 with your appointment this afternoon, and the fort it takes you to get up and out. Hopefully you are seeing more sunshine over your way. We are swinging between overcast days, and bright sunshine ..... and today it's blue sky and sunshine ....

About to get my tooshie up and out of bed, and on the road for a walk and coffee, before my mind start spinning around in circles about this appointment today.

💜💐💕💚🦋💕

haha FC @Faith-and-Hope

I remember you some time back saying 'hello' from D3 (I rememer at the time it was myself and someone else - just can't remember off the top of my head who!) I did wonder at the time how much D3 knew and if it was 'safe' for you - I guess that question (that I never wanted to ask) has now been answered - and is a relief

There has been a little sunshine here over the last week but I haven't been able to 'see' any of it. It is windy again today - not ideal for having to try to get out today to my appointment. I need to be very careful driving - any sudden movement makes me dizzy and if I close my eyes (even for a split second) nausea can hit! Short distances at a time - followed by waiting for the dizziness/nausea to pass and then a short distance again (and repeat). The effort to actually get to the appointment is depressing in itself but I need to go for continued monitoring of blood pressure, breathing, heart rate, etc etc......

Let me know when you have saved the image from last night as I want to change it a little...

I might just have to sit on your shoulder all day today so neither of us are alone - the comfort of knowing you are with me, even when I feel alone, is what helps me so much to get through

If it is the Darkness and Tears one @Zoe7, then I have just saved it to my phone. I have a new iPad a couple of months ago, and WH has now got a new one too, and I have found that there are shared photos. I will have to be careful about which images I store here, because one like that will draw attention, but I believe my phone images are private. There are no indications otherwise. (Grrrr .... )

Please, please take care driving Hon. I hope by then the wind will have calmed down.

💚💐💕

That's the one Hon

Can you create a folder and password protect it @Faith-and-Hope - or would that actually draw even more attention to WH thinking you are 'hiding' something

I am very careful about 'hiding' my 'presence' on this forum from everyone - even my GP who 'found it' for me. She knows I have some very close connections here - yes you get a mention quite often (but with no names or details ) and I don't share images with her that I post here (unless they are 'buried' many, many pages back and slightly different...). I have asked her outright if she 'visits' the forum herself at all (not as a member) and she has said she has had a 'look' at the site previously but that is all.

I think 'protecting my privacy' and feeling safe on here has become a much bigger 'issue' lately with alot of little things that have happened - and that in turn has affected how I interact and what I do post here. Not sure if this will change in the near future - therefore my time here will be minimal for the time being.... but you are 'stuck with me' Hon hahaha - not leaving you just pulling back from interacting with most other members while I try to ride out these waves myself. I know everyone will understand this - it isn't at all personal - it is just all I can deal with atm.

Hi @Zoe7

It's good to see you here and I hope you are feeling a little better

You were missed - I take time out when things are a bit heavy for me and this time out is necessary for everyone now and again so I take it that you were resting and allowing yourself to "refuel" as it were

I hope driving was okay yesterday - how I wish I could drive again - and that your appointment was okay

All the best Butterfly Friend

Dec

Back and showered .... ✅

Yes, anything secretive would draw attention @Zoe7, owing to paranoia as a part of our situation ... and I am assuming, as we haven't experienced a nuclear fall-out, that my use of the forums are either undiscovered, or considered unthreatening in any real sense .... but my presumption is the former.

If anything, it would probably support the notion that I am the one struggling with mi issues, which I believe he is currently promoting within his family, referencing the fact that I have been attending a psychologist.

But on my phone, if discovered or shared within our technology links, the image you have given me will only support that perception .... and I am A-ok with that Zoe7 ..... my support people know where the truth lies, and I haven't concealed my use of the forums from them.

Despite everything that is going on, I have to preserve my own integrity, and not accept intimidation tactics beyond where they make a difference to keeping us safe.