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Am Not Coping

Am Not Coping

I am really not coping at the moment but this is entirely on ME!

This is a message for a few people on here @utopia @Former-Member @Faith-and-Hope @Former-Member

that I asked could be passed on but it seems that only part of it has been and I understand from the responses that have made it through my emails that I have caused untold distress for some people. I was not going to return because of what I felt I put people through but I especially wanted @utopia and @Former-Member to know that they were not wrong at the time and I was going through a real crisis period. You both held me together for longer than I could myself until the point where my own self-destructive thoughts overwhelmed me.

The entire message that I sent to SANE is below:

I have just viewed the multitude of emails and messages sent from forum members and members of the SANE team – as well as the text and voice message left on my phone.

I have not been able to communicate with anyone since the other night as I have been recovering from what ended up being an unsuccessful attempt to end the pain.

At the time I was in a very distressed state and I did want to stop the pain and all I seemed to achieve is to cause others pain and worry and that is the last thing I wanted to do – I just wanted to end mine and say goodbye to everyone beforehand so my future absence was explained. I should have realised that the message I posted would have concerned some people but I really was not in any state to think about the repercussions for others.

I am so sorry I caused so much distress to others – that is something I will have to hopefully try and live with.

I don’t believe after the concern and anxiety I caused to so many that I will ever be able to return to the forum.

Can someone from the SANE team please explain all this to all those involved and pass on my gratitude for their compassion, concerns and kind words throughout the time I have been part of the ‘forum family’.

Thank you and sorry again for the difficult position I put everyone in.

Zoe7

I do not want any responses from any of you. I just wanted to let you know exactly what has happened and let you know how truly sorry I am for hurting people I have come to think of as friends and family, and who I really care about.

Your support, advice and compassion are what make you all the wonderful people you are.

@utopia and @Former-Member I am so sorry that the trust you placed in me has now been broken because of my actions. I also felt that we had a stronger connection, especially over the last week, and you both helped me in ways I cannot even describe or explain. I was not pulling away from you two - just wanted to pull away from myself. I couldn't cope with my own feelings and no-one or nothing was actually going to be able to stop me at the time. It's now just another failure to add to my list of failures. I really don't know what else to say to you both but to reiterate my heartfelt 'sorry'.

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In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

My forum friends are helping me @Sans911 .... look at this amazing "support party " @Zoe7 organised for me ..... it was like a cushion to come home and fall on to ....

@Zoe7, I am out sitting in my car at the moment, trying to talk myself into going home and preparing dinner .... have to defrost something for that ....

I have parked somewhere green ...., not as beautiful as the waterfall image you found for me ..... but as close as I can get to here. I have taken a photo for you to post when I do manage to get my butt home. WH will be leaving for his pm jog soon .... so maybe that will make it feel okay .....

The therapist has given me homework. I have to tell him next week what I am wanting to get out of couple's counselling ....

How can I answer that ?? I want you to tell my husband that he's not well and help us get the support we need for that ? Argh !!

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Glad you had a freind to catch up with @Faith-and-Hope to give you that time out. It must have been a very exhausting and emotional session.

I hope the next sessions go better and you can get the help you deserve.

to you, Nell

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Thanks @Former-Member ..... 🌿

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Your homework needs to be put out of your mind right now (yep easier said than done) but it is too raw and too confronting for you to think about right now @Faith-and-Hope When you have a little 'distance' from it we can look at what you can say objectively to still get 'some' of your message across and lessen the impact for you - if that is what you would like to do Hon.

Are you able to get soemthing on the way home so there is less pressure to cook anything tonight - more time for yourself and less time with the 'family dynamics' around you - just a thought

I am here with you my angel - sitting right beside you - the only thing that is important to me is supporting you in whatever way I can.... and I am hanging on tight to you at the moment with all the love I have

In response to: Am Not Coping

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Thank you so much @Zoe7 .....,

Struggling with my big feelings tonight in a way I haven't for a while ..... but y'all have been showing me how it's done ...,🌷

Sage advice to put the homework away for now ...., think I needed to hear that ..., "park it up for now " .....

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

You are even funny when you are struggling - 'park it up for now' - homework and your car (I thought is was funny anyway lol) @Faith-and-Hope

I am not one bit surprised you are struggling after today - you knew this was going to be so hard and have been doing an amazing of at living each day up to this appointment with hope and your usual strength and grace - now it has happened and all that built up pressure plus the actual appointment are coming out. As hard as this is to feel right now it is the beginning of what you have been wanting for so long - some help and some answers that will move you all from treading water for so long to maybe being able to swim again. This whole situation you are facing is massive - I know it is massive and it is going to be long and difficult - but Hon - you have taken the first step today in moving forward and even though the road ahead is going to be filled with bumps - the community here will light the way for you when you cannot see - because you are very special to so many (not just me) and we want to be here for you just as you have for so many of us You are one special lady @Faith-and-Hope and deserve happiness and peace

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

We are all special @Zoe7 .... every one of us ..... I feel that way when I know you are atruggling ..... and many others here do too ..... I knew you would be here for me in whatever capacity you could be when my big waves started to happen again, and here they come ......

I'm just going to curl up in a corner here and there across the forums and ride this out .....

I still have that photos to load for you later. Going looking for the dolphins now ..... but I'm still here, checking in too ......

💕

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

You curl up wherever you need to Hon - knowing that the only thing that matters right now is that you know we 'have your back' and are here with you

I look forward to seeing the photo - but only when you csn - there is no rush and definitely no pressure to post it. You find some dolphins and marvel at their beauty and their grace - two of the things I most love about you @Faith-and-Hope

In response to: Am Not Coping

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No dolphins yet ......

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

any pelicans? @Faith-and-Hope

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