Is meaningful change possible

I did chuckle and think that @utopia. I knew but only because I learned the hard way. I'm always having to ask but these days it's easier to google it....and way less humiliating

oops i meant humiliating infront of our sons and avoid the eye roll like we know nothing important :face_with_rolling_eyes:😊

Hi @CherryBomb
Thank you for your thoughts and making other contributors aware of my post. I definitely think you are right, recovery definitely isn't linear. Sometimes I have had an epiphany that has changed everything in a five minute moment. I hope I have more positive epiphanies!

Hi @Former-Member
Thank you for your thoughts and what a coincidence! It sounds like you may be in a similar situation, is your blog public? I wouldn't mind reading it if that is alright? My deeper problems stem from the ADD side of my mental illness. Whilst it is my anxiety and OCD that gets most of the attention (because it causes the most distress), the ADD causes the most damage. I have issues with sticking with things that will be beneficial - consistency. Also old patterns that I need to break if I am going to thrive.

I too believe that education in the key so I am studying also, I've come late to the party but it's always been a dream of mine to complete a Bachelor. I've completed a bit under a year so far - 5 units done. Are you studying a Bachelor of some sort? Therapy is the hard way but the best way in my opinion. Congratulations on starting it! I am undergoing some Schema therapy and CBT myself now.

Hi @utopia
Thankyou for your thoughts and kind words of encouragement. I want to loosen the iron grip the ADD has on my life and get on with the things I must do - even if they are time consuming and difficult to do! ADD is so hard to address though I have found, it is sort of non-specific and hard to pin point if that makes sense.

That is great to hear that therapy has really helped you! I am sorry to hear that you had a workplace incident. I am undergoing therapy atm, Schema and CBT. It is early in the piece but I'm going to give it everything I can. Thank you also for the kind words, sometimes when depressed, I don't think I am worthy but I seek help anyways.

Hi @Former-Member
Thankyou, yes feelings definitely lie. I'd be screwed years ago if some of my negative feelings and OCD obsessions were telling me the truth!

Hi @PeppiPatty
Thanks for your thoughts. Yes I think change is very hard because change can be scary. But stagnation is even scarier! I think I've gotten to the point that I can really see and realize that. Change is eventually inevitable - I think it's better to enact it oneself, than have biological age do it for us.

Hi @FringeDweller
Yes I know *exactly* what you mean, it is so frustrating to have those thoughts and feelings you mention and feel helpless. I have had them very strongly over this last Christmas period due to a medication withdrawal. I think it is important to want to change strongly and never give up, until the change is absolutely inevitable. Thank you for your thoughts.

dear @Dothemo

How are you ? Thank you for you very considerate reply to me........

I've been thinking .......a LOT of people have shown huge change in this forum.....

To me, it feels like, at last, after years of being treated in a certain way, of being ignored or

because of Other Unmet Needs Like ......confusion : People can find they are being listened to on Sane Forums & maybe......after a while........

turn their monologues into dialogues.....

I changed like this when I first came here, on Sane Forums ....

..........................................................................................................................................................................

But also.... change like for instance : doing studies and needing a little helping hand in saying hello......

Or me checking in just a hey....I'm lonely and exhausted.....am I an okay person ? Am I acting paranoid ? and after reading a few replies feeling more confident.....

Or: you can change for something like :

a Thing.

A Goal

Something or a Date to work For.

Is this what you mean @Dothemo ??

PP

Hi @Dothemo and everyone .... 😊

For me the key to change is to pace yourself .... it's what I can "baby steps" .... venturing a little at a time in manageable increments, as opposed to attempting and expecting a quantum leap.

Change takes time .... you need to give it it's time ....

Attempted quantum leaps are prone to failure, and that can be a negative vortex .... baby steps, even if they are two steps forward, and one step back, are still a forward movement (as @Former-Member says) .. still progressive.

Expecting quantum leaps can feed unrealistic expectations .... although not always .... a quantum leap can happen when baby steps quickly align and propel you forwards .... but that also means you were ready, and planned the changes carefully, or stepped into a dynamic that really worked well for you at that time.

I hope this helps ....

🌷💜