Left abusive relationship, now to giving up the pot

I am a new user, although I have discovered that I signed up in 2020, about a week before my last hospital stay.

I have recently (2 weeks ago!) managed to escape a 5 year verbally, physically, and financially abusive relationship with a drug addict who dragged me down with him. He manipulated me into the relationship he confessed, but he treated me like crap, and regularly endangered me

I am amazed that I am in the position I'm in now. Back to having the house to myself,, back to being allowed to be happy,, being able to afford to live, and most importantly, now I can also give up the pot. (When I first called the cops on him in Dec 21, it stopped him buying the meth (with my money) but the pot use remained, despite my requests that it stop.).

But it is hard. I am alone, I have no friends, and as a result of the relationship, I have no car, and my goals - losing weight, getting my teeth done, affording hair and beauty (I'm 50 OK? I need it), and clothes eventually, when I have my figure back. I have to consider whether I'm going to go back to work, and I have expensive repairs needing doing here

Obviously I want it all, and now.

But I'm dealing with remaining cold towards my ex partner, and giving up the weed, and that is a lot to deal with when I'm in these four walls, uninterrupted for days on end. I am too nice for my own good, or I'm screaming at people trying to help me.

For the record, I had a head injury, and have since been diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder, among other things. I am high functioning, I have worked on myself. But I am apparently vulnerable, and I am an artist and pensioner.

I published two verse-novels during this relationship, (the first I wrote in the 90s, and the 2nd I wrote last year,) and since quitting meth in 21, have read about 50 classic literature, mostly 19thC material.

Please comfort in me in my isolation, and encourage me. I am a sucker for validation, lol.