Hi @Annette11 reading your post, and hearing of your reluctance to be back at work, it makes me wonder whether your fear of being selfish may be pushing you back to work before you're ready?
I myself have had to take time of work for mental health at different points in myself. The last time I did I was putting pressure on myself to be back at work quickly, and my doctor put it into a perspective that really helped me, and I hope it will help you too: If I had a broken leg no one would be rushing me to start walking on it until it had had enough time to be healed, in fact doing that would likely cause more long term damage and ultimately mean more time spent needing to heal and overcome the damage done by trying to rush the recovery.
Our mental health is the same, it's just more difficult to understand sometimes because you can look at an x-ray and know that you're better, the only thing you can go off is how you're feeling so it's important to listen to yourself and tune in to what's going on for you.
As @MJG017 mentioned, reaching out to your workplace and planning a supportive return to work can also make a huge difference, whether this is coming back on reduced hours, or reduced responsibilities, whatever you feel would help you is work asking for.
Also just a quick note that I've moved this discussion to a part of the forums that better aligns with your post so that we can ensure others can find it more readily
