anxiety ruining everything

I’ve had anxiety all my life but it’s gotten worse over the years because of big changes and affects my everyday life, but the part that affects me the most is not being able to see my boyfriend: I’ve known him since i was a baby and then didn’t talk all my life but reconnected last year. We started calling and ended up meeting at the movies (i was late I had a panic attack and left straight after the movie) and we haven’t met up since (like July last year). We’ve made other plans to meet but I get panic attacks or throw up. Him driving by or dropping something off to me even gives me panic attacks. I wish I could change, obviously for myself but for him, I love him more than life, I just don’t know what to do anymore and how to see him. Does anyone have any advice?