Hi, I'm Swift.

Welcome @swift1

Thank you for sharing your journey here, it sounds as though it's been a really challenging one, but it's amazing to hear everything you're doing now to take care of yourself. It can be so difficult to pump the breaks and stop trying to push ourselves to do these things that ultimately aren't serving us.

I hope that your family will be able to recognise how positive these changes are and how strong you've been for making them. You've put in so much work, it's fair enough that you're tired! I hope that with all this amazing work you've put in that you can finally feel that safety and stability.

Hi @swift1 welcome to the forum. thank you for sharing. I just wanted to let you know that you are not alone. And that's not you are taking mask off. That really mean you are giving priority for yourself. That's what needed most.

Thank you. From tracking my symptoms I have 50% functioning days and 50% non functioning, so I think working two and half days would be good for me.

Today’s experience with a Centrelink officer caused a worsening episode for me. Despite my clear diagnosis and evidence that this is a permanent and severe illness that I have been treating, I can hear the attitude and ignorance in their voice.

It’s nice to talk with people who empathise.

Hey @swift1 ,

I'm sorry to hear your interaction with centrelink didn't go too well.

I hope things work out for you. I hear the frustration the whole process can be.

What are some things that keep you going? Things you enjoy?

Thank you. One of my biggest triggers is not being believed so it creates a spiral when that happens.

I love yoga, journalling, walking, playing games, and my cat.

He’s an absolute rascal and I love him so much. Whenever I’m in bed all day he meows and guides me outside so I can sit in the sun for a while. He greets me every day at the door. I would always wonder why he’d be especially annoying when I’d be having an episode, then I realised he was trying to bring me back. I know I’m having a functioning day when he’s content and sleeping with a little smile on his face. He’s like a reflection.

sorry for rambling I just really love my cat lol

Awwwww @swift1 .

I can see how much you love your cat. You may want to connect to Re: Everything Cats !

I can see your cat keeps you going. What a special bond. What is the life span of cats? I know big dogs are around 10 years, small dogs around 15... but I don't know much about cats...

It sounds so special that they can sense when you need a nudge.

Thank you @Tilz and @Ru-bee. The support means a lot to me. Most of my family has undiagnosed mental illness. Pushing through the pain until it all collapses is our normal, unfortunately.

Thanks, I love seeing the pictures of everyone’s cats. Cats are considered elderly from 12 but many live to 18 or beyond. Mine is 6, which is 40 years old in human years. I got him at 8 weeks from a shelter. Strange to think I’ve been his entire life.

He was going to come in the van with me if I ever did travel again.

Nice @swift1 . That's such a special bond 🙂