Birthday

Hey @MarronButterFly ,

Happy birthday for tomorrow! Thanks for sharing!

It reminds me of when I said I'd never reach my 25th bday. And I'm also still here.

You're a triplet?! Pretty cool, yet I hear it has its challenges.

I'm not a triplet but I have two sisters. I was also the odd one out and I used to hate it. Now? I don't care. I've learnt to accept myself for who I am.

I hope you can also come to this place.

@MarronButterFlyHappy birthday for tomorrow. Also, congratulations on your 8 days. Keep trying to extended the streak and just do the best you can. I don't have any experience with self harm myself, so take my advice as much or as little as you feel you can... but being someone who has been around for over 50 years, I think things do get easier as you get older and learn to deal with things in a better way. So i think things will get easier for you over the next few years, just don't give up and think life is always going to be like this, as much as it seems like it at times.

I obviously don't know you or your sister and your 3rd sibling, but I do know what it's like to feel different from your family and of not really being a part of them. In my case it was because of me being adopted but it sounds like you feel the same especially with your sister. She certainly sounds like a far more dominant personality. And if, like me, you're the opposite and try to avoid any conflict and just go along with what people want then it may just be this difference in personalities rather than she doesn't like you. Maybe you could ask her why you have no say in he party, Maybe you already have... I don't know. I just know that I tend to always assume the worst about what people think of me because I don't communicate well, tend to stay quiet and then assume they don't like me because they don't involve me. But maybe it's because they think I don't care or don't want to be involved. We do tend to assume a lot what other people are thinking so this is why I suggest maybe talking to her and telling her how much it upsets you and why. Just a few thoughts I had anyway.

@MJG017hey thanks yeah honestly I just think it’s difference in personalities and yeah I tend to think the worst about things too and I’m a big people pleaser so yeah I get the way you feel there too

@MarronButterFly

H A P P Y 19th B I R T H D A Y 🎉

https://youtu.be/wSGoUSwNb44?si=4J_IUmrkAPwIpqL0

Happy birthday @MarronButterFly

So you are a Gemini triplet, now that would have been a noisy house growing up, am sure there were many fights and having triplet sisters, well its a wonder the house didn't burn down!!!! From a big family, with three elder sisters who ruled the roost, so I get where you are coming from. Try and not let them boss you about, its your birthday as much as theirs, do what makes you happy for a change, not what gets dictated by others. You deserve to be happy, so let yourself be.........Asgard

Happy Birthday for tomorrow 💓 💗 @MarronButterFly 🎈🎉🎊

@MarronButterFly A belated Happy Birthday! I hope that your birthday was better than expected. It sounds awful to be dominated and excluded like that. I am really sad for you.

I do understand, in my own way, having to share my birthday with somebody else's event with them being narcissistic personality. It was always about them, and not even recognised that it was the only day of the year that I was supposed to be special.

I realise that your situation is a bit different with the controlling people actually being your siblings. Blood is supposedly thicker than water and family are supposed to be there for each other, right?

I have learned, eventually, after 50 years that that stuff is more rare than we expect. People don't necessarily have kind and supportive families. Like I said, it is a lot more common to have a toxic family than not. It is NOT you personally that has done anything wrong, or have anything bad about you! Nearly everyone has their own issues, but people deal with them in different ways. My experience is that a lot of people take it out on those around them, rather than face their own demons.

Sometimes it feels impossible, but please try to remember that they are treating you in an inappropriate way, it's not your fault!

It also doesn't necessarily mean that they are a bad person, so if you have weird mixed feelings about that person, that is pretty normal I would say. I have also found out that it's okay to have two opposing feelings towards a person, not weird. People aren't black or white I guess.

I really hate my birthday because of the past, but since that person is no longer in my life, I have tried to plan something special for myself, mostly done by myself and doesn't have to involve or have to depend on anyone else.

One of my birthdays, I got my first tattoo, on another I got my nostril pierced. Sometimes I see a movie. I prefer to do that alone, nobody chatting and commenting in my ear. (I'm trying to see the glass half full, rather than half empty). I could mourn the fact that I had to do those things alone, but the power of choosing to do something special for myself can be quite uplifting.

I guess it's too late for this birthday, but never too late to plan for the next one.

Take care, remember that you are just as special as everybody else. 🙂

@MarronButterFly

Happy 19th birthday!

I went out and got a butterfly birthday cake - ESPECIALLY FOR YOU!

You deserve a good life and to be happy.

Life is tough until you realise that in reality "people pleasing" doesn't tend to make anyone happy...and especially not you. In fact... setting boundaries and letting people know when they are stepping over your comfort zone... is the only way to feel safe in your interactions. Those who don't respect your needs (even after you have clearly stated them)...dont deserve you. Put your best foot forward, smile and walk on.

Hi @MarronButterFly

So how was your birthday, what did you get up to, am all ears whether it turned out good or bad........Asgard

@Asgard @Yeah it was okay it got pretty sad for me lol cause I only had two friends there and one of them left and I ended up drinking a little too much but yeah it was mainly my sisters party