Work

Hello @Former-Member,

Sounds like you had a really really rough night last night, it's a shame you had so many issues and found the online options lacking in support 😞

I am so glad to hear that your husband has been there for you and taken the day off today to be with you as you are feeling really bad. If you are feeling quite anxious and like having a panic attack, try to do something like deep breaths or listening to calm music so you get back on top of your breathing.

There seems to be quite a lot happening at the moment, which is making you feel attacked and I am assuming so very overwhelmed. Just try to focus on today and what you can do to make you feel calm, take one thing at a time, we are here for you, keep chatting.

Lunar ❤️

@Former-Member

Sorry you had such a bad night but you are so lucky to have such a supportive husband.

Ultimately one thing you have to learn which I'm really trying to instill in myself is that work is work (I know its hard to make it seem like just work because as we both feel that we are perfect and shine at work), but your health both mental and physical is number one. The work will be good again. If you feel they are screwing you around, remember you can always get another job (I understand the stress in this) but you cant get another hubby or you so that should come first. Plus it sounds like you are like me that we hold ourselves to a high standard with work. I think we have to learn to ease up on our selves and accept we are not perfect and cant be all the time. Believe me I know how hard it is, if I make a mistake at work I will stress and freak out until its fixed. I remember one time I was nearly in tears I had stuffed someones pay up but it was all fixable and not really a drama. I had to tell the boss and I was just about having a panic attack on the spot and she said the same thing "dont stress you can fix it - stop being so hard on yourself" and I know thats one of my downfalls I am really hard on myself but starting to learn to ease up a bit.

Also have you seen your doctor about your meds? I went through a bad meltdown a few months ago and was at breaking point just like you. I found out that my dosage for anxiety tablets was very low and they slowly built that up and now I'm feeling a lot better. I used to wake up feeling like I would throw up at the thought of facing the day but now I'm a lot better. Still get anxious and panic but I know whats happening and also realise how to calm myself down with breathing excercises - if you havent done them they do really help. Have you done DBT (dialetical behavour therapy)? Its usually set as a group and they teach you coping skills and how to overcome some of our issues. The tools they give you are great but it doesnt happen over night and needs a lot of work by us. For me when I'm really really anxious I usually do something physical like play with my dog or gardening. Its hard as anything to start but once I force myself I get distracted and tired and then start to calm down, or have a bath with some relaxing music. If that doesnt work something else that is meant to help stop SH and I have tried this once myself is when you are feeling really anxious hold some ice cubes in your hand until you cant stand it anymore and it does calm you down its weird but it worked for me, just satisfys that need without actually hurting yourself.

You can do this but be gentle with yourself, it takes time and practice.