D.I.D....

Bad night last night. A SH/SA? trip to emergency for daughter was compounded by the fact that they decided to swab test her for COVID-19. Fair enough. Except that meant she couldn't catch a taxi home, and they didn't want her hanging around the waiting room. At four in the morning with rain threatening, where was she meant to go? She phoned us, very upset... Hubby was still under the effects if his nighttime medication, so wasn't able to drive, no-one else in the immediate family has a licence, and friends that she might have asked otherwise have health conditions that might make them more subsceptible.

There's been no cases anywhere in our region for a week or two, and were never many to start with. Almost nil chance she'd test positive. So effectively she was stranded by red tape. I do understand why they want a wide range of community tests done, but I don't think they thought this situation through properly. MH staff wouldn't come and see her, not at any point in her visit, even though she'd been resistant to going in the ambulance. We couldn't pick her up until nearly 8 a.m., so she was exhausted and had been through considerable distress. Not what you want when she was distressed before any of that even happened.

I'm encouraging her to lodge an official complaint. They were following their guidelines, but in the situation, mishandled the discretionary aspects of those badly.

She really needs to find some way of keeping herself safe and away from the hospital. Psychologists are increasingly worried about the MH collateral damage from the pandemic response. I'm increasingly concerned that she may come under that. 😞

And we're exhausted now too. Neither of us slept after the phone call, despite Hubby's grogginess.

Oh @Smc 😕

@Smc Thinking of you today especially.

🙏

@Smc

Ta @Determined, @outlander.

Have just been talking to her on the phone re. the financial requirements of moving out on her own. And the personal requirements. We're concerned that new neighbours might not appreciate frequent nighttime appearances of emergency vehicles. And she hasn't got enough for a bond, plus she'd be paying extra rent with an already full budget. So that means a place that has right now caught her eye is not happening.

We're advising her to look into financial counselling, preferably a reduced price/free service for health care card/pension card holders. And hoping that our conversation tonight doesn't tip over her frame of mind,

Thanks @outlander.

My big concern is that when a plan that she's fixed on can't move forwards, she easily slips into a "despairing" state where she's more likely to be a danger to herself. 😞 But if her budget is really as inflexibly full as she says it is, she'd be turning up at the local charities for food hampers and help with bills within the first month. While I am glad these charities exist, I know the local services are overloaded and don't always have enough to help everyone who asks... and I don't think she'd taken in the fact that by moving house, she'd be putting herself in that position. Week to week, she's got more $$ coming in than we have, and I don't know exactly how much of her buget is really complete essentials. Some certainly is, but I'm hoping that financial advice could help her find wriggle room.

I'm uneasy about the whole house move idea too. In a place on her own, there's even less of a watchful eye in her bad patches than there is now. (Most of the dangerous stuff happens in her bedroom, where her brother can't exactly be keeping a lookout.) But given that she's been increasingly fixed on moving for the past year or so, I don't think we can stop her. And her brother is getting increasingly stressed. But if she does move, I hope there can be some kind of regular "safety check-in" put in place.

'My big concern is that when a plan that she's fixed on can't move forwards, she easily slips into a "despairing" state where she's more likely to be a danger to herself'

Understand that emotion well @Smc 😕

Thinking of you and praying 🙏

I can see how the uncertainty would be affecting your son also. 🙏🙏

Morning @Smc

Continuing to think of you and family 🙏

So the news is, she's realised some of her expenses will now be covered by her NDIS funding, which creates "wriggle room" in her budget. Today's conversation has been around saving to cover bond and a month's rent plus-a-bit, and whether she can ask her carer to schedule a 5 minute welfare telephone check up on days when she doens't see anyone. Limiting it to a short call both so it's not too much of the carer's time (I didn't say it, but "how has your day been" can stretch out to a very long conversation) and also so that it's less on an intrusion into Older Daughter's day. And re-emphasising that she can't have emergency services turning up at her door all the time... so try to put something in place to forestall that.