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Managing relationships

Mental Health & Relationship Breakdown

illuminateContributor

Mental Health & Relationship Breakdown

Hi All

This is my very first post. What a great resource!

I have complex MH issues. I have borderline personality issues, trauma, anxiety and depression. My latest relationship of 4 1/2 years ended in 2022.
I tried to stay friends with my ex but I haven’t been able to. My feelings for him and wanting us to work were misguided. I feel like such a failure because of this. I feel that it’s all my fault and that I’m just too broken. As a result I have isolated myself from everyone. The relationship that broke down wasn’t healthy, he has complex issues too but he wouldn’t talk to me or anyone. He actually said ‘my feelings are my problem’ and refused couples counselling. I feel like I’m to blame for everything and feeling very isolated and lonely.

How do I move forward? I honestly feel like others are better off without me in their lives.

Thank you for reading.

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In response to: Mental Health & Relationship Breakdown

illuminateContributor

Re: Mental Health & Relationship Breakdown

Thank you for the details on those resources. I do have a psychologist who has been a great help so I’m a bit reluctant to try another service atm. It might be overwhelming and counterproductive but I appreciate knowing that there’s alternatives.

In response to: Mental Health & Relationship Breakdown

illuminateContributor

Re: Mental Health & Relationship Breakdown

Thank you for your lovely words of support. I really appreciate it. I think I’m finding it hard to let go of my ex as I’m a believer in commitment and working through issues with a partner. I think I have to accept that I’m willing to help myself but my ex isn’t willing to help himself with his issues. I haven’t had a relationship breakup before that wasn’t mutual so it’s a bit of a learning curve. I’m trying to not beat myself up over it but because he won’t talk I feel like everything is my fault. This is hard for me to accept. The feelings of not being ‘good enough’ I understand are irrational but keep popping into my head.
I’m having a hospital stay in a few days so I’m hoping that I can work through some of this whilst having some medication changes.
Thanks again.
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SANE acknowledges the Traditional Owners of Country throughout Australia and recognises the continuing connection to lands, waters and communities. We pay our respect to Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander cultures; and to Elders past and present.

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