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Unknown userMember
Hello All,
Christmas reminds me of times as a child celebrating at my grandparents, they have passed away decades ago. Christmas reminds me of family feasts my dad used to cook, who passed away 15 years ago. Christmas reminds me of my mum baking cookies, whereas she now has returned to her original faith and does not celebrate Xmas, which is distressing me. Christmas reminds me of spending time with people who abused me as a child.
Christmas makes me sick.
In response to: Christmas
Unknown userMember
Hello @Former-Member,
A warm welcome to the forums, thank for sharing with us. It sounds like you are not coping so well with being reminded of your parents and grandparents around christmas time, I hope you find the forums supportive and are also seeking some support elsewhere?
There a quite a few people on here who have similar thoughts around being distressed at christmas on some other threads if you would like to read through how others are coping :
Is it okay to ignore Christmas blog
The forums will be moderated 24/7 over the break so please keep sharing how you are doing 🙂
Lunar
In response to: Re: Christmas
Zoe7Senior Contributor
Morning @Former-Member
@Former-Member Do check out the threads Lunar mentioned. There are amazingly supportive people on this forum - many who share similar thoughts around christmas. Keep posting and we will keep listening and do what we can to help you through this crazy time of year. You will not be alone over Christmas - stay connected and keep sharing how you are doing.
In response to: Christmas
Unknown userMember
Hi @Former-Member,
Welcome to the forum.
Sounds like this time of the year is really hard for you. Please check out the links @Former-Member provided and share your thoughts on what you see these resources.
Like @Zoe7 said, there are many people in this forum who are very supportive. Have you tried our search function? Try type in `coping with X'mas' or `getting through hard times' to see what comes up. Try this thread as well beause people were sharing strategies and hope you'll get some different ideas that suit you.
Take care and many people here are with you.
In response to: Re: Christmas
AppleblossomSenior Contributor
@Former-Member
Hi @Former-Member
Christmas is so layered with many different memories and experiences and beliefs an traditions.
The best way I have found to managae my MIXED FEELINGS about it .. is to take some conscious active cntrol of it.
We cant control everything .. an should not ALLOW others to control it ALL .. but by doing a couple of things MY WAY .. I find I can cope .. an am being true to myself.
I had to wait today to fin out what we were going to do and plan a menu etc .. but thats ok an I am happy with our plan .. it will just be the 2 of us .. in my mini family .. I was prepare to go it alone .. an will come online too.
my ds arent woriking on keyboar
In response to: Christmas
Unknown userMember
In response to: Re: Christmas
Zoe7Senior Contributor
oh @Appleblossom hope santa brings you a new keyboard for Christmas!!!!
@Former-Member I do have some family coming for Christmas lunch but hoping they aren't here too long - so will also be around for you if needed for most of the day x
As appleblossom said control what you can - try to get through what you can't control and reach out for support if needed. Thinking of you x
In response to: Christmas
Unknown userMember
hello @Former-Member
yes it can be a very sad and lonely time for so many people and in your case you have memories.
Are you a list maker or a person who uses a journal, or makes notes? If so
Are you able to write down all the memories you had celebrating with your grandparents. where you were, did you share food, how old were you. what was it that you enjoyed, was their laughter, stories. can you remember snippets that you could write down as they come to you.
family feasts your father cooked. wow males are very good cooks. what nationality was your father. did he cook traditional food or was he creative and surprised you with all sorts of flavours? perhaps you could write down, what you remember, see, smell, hear, feel about those good times. how wonderful to have had a father who cooked. my dad used to cook and make a mess at the same time, food was lovely, but lots of washing up to do afterwards.
you can write whatever you like on here. nobody on here judges. we are all here to help ourselves through difficult times and at the same time support others. we cannot feel your sadness but we can read your words and empathise. It is perfectly alright for you to not like christmas. Sunday can just be another sunday for you. when i was with my son when he was in hospital in november. he did not want to see me because it was his birthday. in the end i said to him we dont need to think of your birthday today, today is thursday, we will go and do something on thursday and we did.
we are here to support.
please write back to us if you are able. some of us might not be on here every day. there will be someone so you might find different people. that is ok too.
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SANE acknowledges the Traditional Owners of Country throughout Australia and recognises the continuing connection to lands, waters and communities. We pay our respect to Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander cultures; and to Elders past and present.
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