Felling lost

Hey I'm new to this group and I wanted to share a little bit about my story then ask for a little guidance.

So I was attacked at work by a student 5 years ago. I am still in physical pain daily but my mental health was under control. So I was working full time, studying and being a parent.

3 months ago there was another incident that ended me in hospital and 2 weeks later i was attacked again. After that I haven't been back to work and my pstd is thru the roof.

So for over 2 months I'm lucky to get 3 hours broken sleep

I am on medication, doing EFT, EMRD I see a psychologist weekly and a psychiatrist weekly at the moment because of the flair up.

But the reason I'm here and I guess I am feeling so lost is everyone is enjoying their breaks and holidays and are festive and I don't want to deal with it. I wish I could skip December all together and go to January I'm sick of plastering a fake smile on my face and having to look like a human when I don't feel like a human.

Also the worst part is ever since I haven't been at work I have been isolating in my room listening to music and checking on the kids everytime I get up cause I don't sit still much and I fidget alot plus they know where to find me too there also not babies so they can look after themselves.

I know I want to get out of my rut but everytime I try something happens now I don't see the point of trying to leave my comfy space