XLunaMoonXCasual Contributor
Heart break
- I feel like I'm deadset going insane me and my ex broke up like a month ago and it seriously feels like trying to go cold Turkey on an addiction. I had a mental break and it scared him and he threw me out clearly because he didn't feel safe but I've been homeless since and so much bad stuff has happened ontop of the trying to cope. I just can't leave this man alone. For 2 weeks we called and texted everyday which made things feel normal but after a booty call at his house I broke down again the next day just wanting to go home to him and now he's pretty much ghosting me unless I need belongings from his house or I start a fight just to try and get some attention from him even tho it's bad. Like tonight I'm sleeping in my car so I parked near his house as it feels safe but I got so mad that he wasn't replying to me even tho he was so close to me that I went off in hopes he'd atleast come out and yell at me just so I could see him but instead he comes out and hands me a giant stuffed animal I told him 6 months ago about that I've wanted for Years and goes "here I was going to wrap it for u but you've pissed me off merry Christmas" N walked away shaking his head he sounded so disappointed and I have no idea what to do I don't like being like this I want to be friends but I keep digging myself a bigger hole by causing fights with him. I love him so much and would mountains for this man but I don't know what to do anymore. It seems like he cares as when my mental health gets bad hell check on me and he's brought me this gift which I know would of been a purchase within the past few days but then other days hell just leave me on read. Being without him is hellll but trying to speak to him Is the same. I just need to find the right words to communicate that hey. I want to be friends can u please tell me exactly what u need for that to happen even if it's no contact for a week or so just so I know if it's even possible but I can't find a way to get that to him without being ignored or blowing up on him. It's so draining I just want my old life back.