Topic Tuesday// Speak Up: The Power in Using Your Voice // Tuesday 30th January 2024 5:30-7PM AEDT

This entire conversation has been absolutely perfect ❤️

I feel like I have growth opportunities available and some ideas that I haven't considered

So unbelievablely grateful

I am stuck in a horrible situation whereby it doesn't matter how assertively I communicate my needs with my son, he steadfastly refuses to accept my diagnosis and my needs, eg: he refuses to push me in my wheelchair if I get tired because he believes I can just get up and walk! It would be funny if it weren't so hurtful. Can anyone give me any advice?

@TideisTurning

Thanks for the topic

At times I'm really great at speaking up and standing up for myself and other times this isn't a great strength as it takes my brain to process what people say. This is something I need to continously work on.

People can say cruel thing's, it can mostly be the ones that are closest to you as well.

And I'm guess I get afraid that if I become the assertive person to everyone then I'll end up with no one in my life.

Knowing when to say something is the hard part and the fact my brain doesn't process what people say until later sometimes makes it a little challenging as well.

But as I said, it's a work it progress.

I hope that all makes sense

It would be lovely to be able to shrug thing's off, but unfortunately we have feelin

Igs and some are more sensitive then other's (🙋‍♀️)

I'm so sorry you're experiencing that @Cali_Rose

Sending you so many hugs ❤️

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@Cali_Rose wrote:

I am stuck in a horrible situation whereby it doesn't matter how assertively I communicate my needs with my son, he steadfastly refuses to accept my diagnosis and my needs, eg: he refuses to push me in my wheelchair if I get tired because he believes I can just get up and walk! It would be funny if it weren't so hurtful. Can anyone give me any advice?

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Is it possible that pushing you might be too exhausting for him to do on a regular basis? If he's not up to the task of giving you the assistance you need, do you have other options?

He's 28 and fit and healthy! I am only seeing him for 5 days because he lives in Scotland and has been on at me to visit. I have never travelled overseas as a person with a disability before. I only need his help to push every now and then.

@Cali_Rose Thank you for sharing you situation- this sounds really tough and sometimes no matter no hard we try people can be set in their ways. Something I might suggest rather than having to use your own voice, that sharing the perspective of others (maybe public disability advocates?) about your diagnosis. Sometimes when we have a relationship with sometime (especially parent/child) and we are not being heard this can get really complicated with how to approach the other person's stigma or closemindedness! I hope that you can experience some change in your situation!

Thank you so much for sharing @Hopefulsoul. I feel like so much of what you've said resonates with me, and I'm sure others too. Advocacy can most definitely be easier in some situations than others, for a variety of reasons. It's also ok for it to be something you continue to work on as you improve, learn and gain more confidence 😊

I just want to thank everyone for their beautiful contributions tonight! I also wanted to share some further resources if anyone is interested in getting into these topics further:

FURTHER READING AND RESOURCES

Self-advocacy & your rights

The UN's Universal Declaration of Human Rights

Mental health statement of rights and responsibilities

Speak Up Be Heard- Self Advocacy Toolkit

[Podcast] The Square Peg - 98. (S8-E6) The fight for equality in education and work: an inspiring story of Autistic self-advocacy

Self-advocacy for the NDIS Workbook

Self-Advocacy Toolkit - Mental Health Family & Friends Tasmania

How to Think More Assertively Module

Mental Health Advocacy e-learning

Activism

Self-Care for Advocates 101

Staying Resilient Workbook by Amnesty International

How Call Out Culture Is A Catalyst For Intersectionality At Work

Doing Activism My Way by Carly Findlay

The Revolution Starts With Me! Promoting Self Care & Preventing Activist Burnout by Nicole Clark & Adaku Utah

Effective Activist Zine - An Evidence-Based Guide to Progressive Social Change

How to Use Activism as Self-Care

How to be an Activist Without Burning Out

[Podcast] Unlocking Us with Brené Brown- Brené with Laverne Cox on Transgender Representation, Advocacy and the Power of Love

Solidarity with Palestine: Free Resources and Further Reading | Verso Books

Why self-care and collective wellbeing are critical to winning change

Self-development, recovery and personal growth tools

Improving Assertiveness Self-Help Resources

A bill of rights for confidence, self-esteem and assertiveness

Developing Balanced Core Beliefs

Living Into Our Values - Brené Brown

The Transformation of Silence into Language and Action by Audre Lorde

[Podcast]: Paradigm Shift with Ayandastood- Episode 10 Finding Your Voice

Polyvagal Theory: A Science of Safety by Stephen W. Porges

Why Healing Trauma Starts with Creating Safety