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How do I tell my parents - WARNING: self harm

bellywellywooCasual Contributor14 Nov 2023, 6:57 pm AEDT

How do I tell my parents - WARNING: self harm

I am a pretty young person with body image issues and sometimes I feel like the only thing I can do to control one thing in my life is to hurt myself. It doesn't matter if I do something good, I still don't like anything about me. My parents recently found out that I have body image issues and tried to take my phone away. And I want to tell them about my self-harm but I'm scared of what they'll do. Does anyone know how do I tell them?

10 replies

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In response to: How do I tell my parents - WARNING: self harm

Gina2Contributor14 Nov 2023, 7:15 pm AEDT

Re: How do I tell my parents - WARNING: self harm

Hi @bellywellywoo,

I see your a new contributor, welcome to the forums!

I'm sorry you've been struggling lately.

I understand why you are afraid to talk to your parents, especially after their reaction from before but if you really want to talk to your parents about how you feel, you should do it.

Mentally prepare yourself in case it doesn't go well but try to remember they will probably be scared for you. I really hope that it does go well.

Maybe try and see if you can get some help from them like suggesting counselling for your body image.

I wish you all the best,

Gina2

In response to: Re: How do I tell my parents - WARNING: self harm

bellywellywooCasual Contributor14 Nov 2023, 7:22 pm AEDT

Re: How do I tell my parents - WARNING: self harm

thanks so much for the advice @Gina2. Do you (or any websites that are helpful) know what i can say to them to start the conversation

In response to: How do I tell my parents - WARNING: self harm

BookloverContributor14 Nov 2023, 7:29 pm AEDT

Re: How do I tell my parents - WARNING: self harm

Before I told my family I was schizophrenic, I had similar fears. I managed it by not thinking of it, I just said it. Even pretend that they’re not in the room. I ignored my emotions and said the words I needed to say like I was in a stage play. Their reaction was disbelief. Now, twenty years after being diagnosed, they accept it though they can never understand it.

I hope this helps. I’m no expert but my family and friends treat me like they did before. Even when I’m stuck in an episode.

In response to: Re: How do I tell my parents - WARNING: self harm

Gina2Contributor14 Nov 2023, 7:36 pm AEDT

Re: How do I tell my parents - WARNING: self harm

Hi @bellywellywoo,

I'm glad my you found my advise helpful.

Here are some good websites I found useful, hopefully these help you.

Beyond blue

hiddenstrength.com

youngminds.org.uk

I hope these help,

Gina2

In response to: Re: How do I tell my parents - WARNING: self harm

Zoe7Senior Contributor14 Nov 2023, 7:39 pm AEDT

Re: How do I tell my parents - WARNING: self harm

Hey @bellywellywoo Try this link also Somerset Health UK

In response to: How do I tell my parents - WARNING: self harm

Miss-wishSenior Contributor14 Nov 2023, 8:24 pm AEDT

Re: How do I tell my parents - WARNING: self harm

HI @bellywellywoo,

have you got someone you trust to be there while you tell them for support? Have you got someone to talk to either a friend or counsellor? my daughter used to self harm as a way to just feel something, in later years with help we worked out it was apart of her body dysmorphia. This is something for you to decide to do, when you feel its the right time.

Sane have some wonderful peer counsellors that have lived experience to talk to, I know mine was wonderful and helped me so much.

In response to: How do I tell my parents - WARNING: self harm

MissMuffetSenior Contributor15 Nov 2023, 7:38 am AEDT

Re: How do I tell my parents - WARNING: self harm

Morning @bellywellywoo

How are you feeling this morning?

I don't know what your relationship with your parents is like but for me, I never told my parents what I was going through because I didn't want to worry them.

I am 30 and they know now. Well, mostly - my dad didn't know I had suicidal thoughts when I was younger until I randomly said it in passing a few months ago (he was quite shocked) and my mum only found out after the fact but said "we didn't know you were that bad". Looking back, I didn't even tell the truth to my psychologist because I was ashamed. I do believe that if people knew I would have been able to get help a lot sooner.

Now it sounds like you under 25 which means (depending on where you live) you are able to use Headspace. Check out their website if you like https://headspace.org.au

It sounds like you need help and if they don't know what to do, you could ask them to take you to Headspace.

I know it can be really hard opening up to people but the sooner you do the sooner you can get help. We're here for you on the forums if you need.

Goodluck!

In response to: Re: How do I tell my parents - WARNING: self harm

bellywellywooCasual Contributor15 Nov 2023, 8:32 am AEDT

Re: How do I tell my parents - WARNING: self harm

i do have some really close friends. I also have a boyfriend that i have told, he also advised me to tell my parents. I'll look into the counsellors, i hope your daughters doing better 🙂

In response to: Re: How do I tell my parents - WARNING: self harm

Miss-wishSenior Contributor15 Nov 2023, 12:59 pm AEDT

Re: How do I tell my parents - WARNING: self harm

@bellywellywoo That's great news 🙂 Just when you are ready.

My daughter is doing better now, after trying 2 psychologist that didn't fit her, we finally found one that did and she has worked out what makes her, her and worthy of being herself 🙂 I know you will do the same 🙂

In response to: Re: How do I tell my parents - WARNING: self harm

BowSenior Contributor15 Nov 2023, 1:33 pm AEDT

Re: How do I tell my parents - WARNING: self harm

Hi @bellywellywoo

@welcome to the forums and thanks for sharing a bit of your story with us.

Im 40, have battled with my mental health on and off for over 20 years and have struggled with self harm too. I am currently struggling with body image issues too and use self harm as a way to cope with alot of things at the moment.

My mum knows about my previous struggles with self harm and recently found out about my current issues.

I think it’s great that you want to talk to your parents about it. Not sure what your relationship is like with them and what kind of parents they are but they will probably want to help you. They will hate that you are hurting yourself in this way. Their reactions may feel over the top, they may fuss, they may want to search your room and remove any items that you can hurt yourself with and they will probably want you to get some support. Please don’t let all that turn you off talking to them, but just be prepared for a variety of responses from them. It would be good if you can have a support person with you when you tell them.

All the best

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