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New psychologist

BlueBaySenior Contributor29 Nov 2016, 3:52 pm AEDT

New psychologist

Today I saw a new psychologist. She was okay but said I needed a lot of therapy long term, as there is a lot of childhood trauma.But the problem is she is so expensive. And she said i need to see her weekly. And if i miss 3 sessions she would have to decide whether or not i can still see her!!!!

So she said go home, have a think and if you want to come back then make another appt.

But this afternooon I remembered my psychiatrist referring me to another psychologist who works in the same rooms as him. I called them and although she charges similar fees the receptionist said that if i can speak to my psychiatrist about the financial difficulties that he will speak with her and she can bulk bill me.

Fingers crossed. I have made an appt to see her this coming Friday and I will suss her out and see how she is. She apparently is very experienced and deals with trauma and BPD. It really is difficult when seeing someone new. I suppose i can only give it a go.

I also phoned the hospital today and I may go in as early as Friday this week or early next week.

Why does life have to be so damn hard all the time?

3 replies

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In response to: New psychologist

Change123Senior Contributor29 Nov 2016, 4:07 pm AEDT

Re: New psychologist

@BlueBay thats great if you can be bulk billed!

How are you feeling after the session, you sound ok? I know they can be very emotionally draining.

And the cost I know, how do they expect us to be able to pay for such expensive treatment, she may be the best but it doesnt help if you cant pay for it!

Let us know how you go.

Wondering if you can share something since we are so similar.

Do you have issues of your brain seeming to go too fast like in fast forward? Not exactly manic just that before you get a chance to "think before you speak" does it just come out for you like it does for me? If only I can get past this I would be a lot better its like my brain is in automatic and it just comes out before I know it, my partner keeps telling me to slow down as he see it also as an issue and he is right. I often just react without thinking - maybe I have just been hardwired this way.

Thinking of you.

In response to: Re: New psychologist

BlueBaySenior Contributor29 Nov 2016, 4:18 pm AEDT

Re: New psychologist

Hi @Change123

I feel that nearly everyone i have spoken to (not on here) dont care about us BPD. I think we are in the 'too hard basket' so therefore it's hard to get the right treatment.

Why does treatment have to be so damn expensive? Why can't the govt help out a lot more than their reduced rate and 6 MH plan visits.

I'm hoping that when I speak to my psych that he can talk to her and she agrees to bulk bill me otherwise its a no go. I just can't afford the money. Yes am emotionally drained, all i did was cry and dissociate, not even looking at her. And before i knew it, it was time to leave.

Yes my brain goes fast forward all the time. It doesn't stop like it's in a race!! Ha ha you make me laugh. just last week at work i was commenting on a customer and saying things to her and laughing And when she left i said to my co-worker OMG the things that come out of my mouth. I would never say the things i did but recently i just don't think before i speak. Yes this is me too 🙂

Yeah i think when we are hardwired in a certain way, we tend to stay like that. It was interesting that I told this new psychologist today that i am terrified, scared so much of getting bettert because the fear is huge that i will have no support people anymore. She said that's interesting and that is why DBT isn't working for you because you are so scared and petrified of getting better for fear of being abandoned yet again.

I coudn't stop crying when she said that. I don't know what to do anymore, i feel like i am at a loss 😞

How are you today?

In response to: Re: New psychologist

Change123Senior Contributor29 Nov 2016, 5:08 pm AEDT

Re: New psychologist

I'm feeling a little better, things are a bit better at home so unfortunately I'm very co dependent with my partner as soon as his mood goes down I start going down big time. I'm still feeling very hopeless like I dont know what to do to stop this "racing thing" if I could slow down in my thinking that would help so much as then I could think before I speak! Just like me saying to my partners friend when explaining something "ita all wet and drippy!" yes I hve heard about that one now from my partner.

He says he doesnt understand why we dont just stop what we are doing, if it was that simple we would have stopped years ago. No one tends to understand when I talk about the racing mind and how things just come out, no filter at all! My partner says the same thing that I dont want to get better. Look I understand that it looks that way to them and maybe our brains are so hardwired so the brain tries to keep us doing the same things as its used to it but they really dont understand how much we want to change outwardly and how hard it is. I wish it was a conscious decision and then we would stop. Maybe the problem is we cant "see the forest for the trees" so to speak???

My partner is now trying, which I'm giving a go is that everytime I do something BPD he tells me about it and how it makes him feel - at the moment he is doing this in a civil tone which is ok. He was told that if he does that constantly eventually it will get too much for me and I will realise that I need to change to stop the same outcome. I dont know I will try anything right now and still feeling very isolated though in the sense I'm really sick of partners, doctors, work and people in general who know acting like I'm doing this on purpose and getting some sort of vendetta out of it.

Hang in there and we will try to get through this together on here!

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