Connect with people who understand what you are going through, seek advice and surround yourself with support. We're free, anonymous, and professionally moderated 24/7.
The-red-centaurSenior Contributor
I feel really sad. My stepfather died 2 and half weeks ago. The funeral was today. Since it was in Europe I couldn't go, even if I had the 5 grand to get myself there I wouldn't have been able to go.
I don't know how to cope tonight. I lit a candle for him and I'm crying.
In response to: Sad
AppleblossomSenior Contributor
Death hits us hard @The-red-centaur Not being part of the funeral can be isolating. Crying and lighting a candle show you care.
Just saying hello
Apple
In response to: Re: Sad
The-red-centaurSenior Contributor
@Appleblossom thanks
In response to: Sad
DimitySenior Contributor
My deepest sympathy @The-red-centaur . It hits us hard even when we've been expecting it. Take time to grieve. He mattered.
Take care
Dimity
In response to: Re: Sad
Captain24Senior Contributor
I don’t really know what to say other than I’m sorry for your loss @The-red-centaur.
Lighting a candle is a lovely memorial.
In response to: Sad
Queenb72Contributor
I am sorry, can you think of him personally yourself and light a candle?
In response to: Re: Sad
NatureLoverSenior Contributor
Sorry for your big loss, @The-red-centaur 😢 Thinking of you in your grief ❤️
In response to: Sad
hanamiSenior Contributor
Thinking of you @The-red-centaur
I'm so sorry to hear of this loss.
Take care
Hanami
In response to: Re: Sad
AppleblossomSenior Contributor
Dear @The-red-centaur Grieving happens in its own way unique to you.
If you feel like memorialising in some way ... I have little things around the house (photos, plants or gifts from them or a book etc) to remind me of my dead people. Sometimes I will light a candle on special feast days like their birthdays or dates of death, but not always, I also eventually have come to see when I 'miss' a memorial day, it is probably a good thing, not clinging to the past but moving into my future, with them in my heart if not alive on the planet.
In response to: Re: Sad
Shaz51Senior Contributor
hugs my friend @The-red-centaur , thinking of you lots
In response to: Re: Sad
The-red-centaurSenior Contributor
Help us push aside the stigma and discrimination surrounding complex mental health and change the way people talk about, and care for, mental illness.
SANE acknowledges the Traditional Owners of Country throughout Australia and recognises the continuing connection to lands, waters and communities. We pay our respect to Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander cultures; and to Elders past and present.
SANE values diversity. We are committed to providing a safe, culturally appropriate, and inclusive service for all people, regardless of their ethnicity, faith, disability, sexuality, or gender identity.
Help us push aside the stigma and discrimination surrounding complex mental health and change the way people talk about, and care for, mental illness.
SANE acknowledges the Traditional Owners of Country throughout Australia and recognises the continuing connection to lands, waters and communities. We pay our respect to Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander cultures; and to Elders past and present.
SANE values diversity. We are committed to providing a safe, culturally appropriate, and inclusive service for all people, regardless of their ethnicity, faith, disability, sexuality, or gender identity.
You’ll soon be able to use one secure login to access all SANE services.
For added security, members are now required to log in with their email address and password - member names are no longer supported for logging in.
If you had a Forums account before 19 May 2026 and haven’t set up your new login yet, you'll be prompted to set up your new secure login when you sign-in.
Fields marked * are required
