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Something’s not right

I hate myself and hole I've dug

I hate myself and hole I've dug

I've made a lot of mistakes in my life that have had a big impact on me and others close to me. Yes, a lot of these have been influenced by my own poor mental health, but that does not absolve me of taking ownership of the consequences.

I just keep hurting myself and other people. Time and time again.

How can I live with myself knowing I've done all this bad stuff?

4 replies

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In response to: I hate myself and hole I've dug

Re: I hate myself and hole I've dug

Hi @Jlol

I feel that if you take ownership of the mistakes you've made and make a genuine effort not to make the same mistakes then people will know this and forgive you. We are always hardest on ourselves. I'm 54 and think about things I did so many years ago I wish I could change but I guess I've learned the past is the past. Life is too short to dwell on things that can't be changed. I prefer to focus on the now. I know that's easier said than done. It's taken me some time to reach this point. And I regret not getting there sooner. But what's done is done. We can only change, focus on what we can do now and moving forward.

Hanami

In response to: I hate myself and hole I've dug

Re: I hate myself and hole I've dug

I know how you feel. I've just lost a true friend from my emotional outburst. I'm heartbroken.

In response to: Re: I hate myself and hole I've dug

Re: I hate myself and hole I've dug

Hi @Nezumidoshi and @Jlol ,

It sounds like a very dark place to be in.

Sharing my own experiences, I used to have a lot of angry outbursts of intense rage. Over time, with treatment and support, I learnt to slow down these feelings, give myself some space between the emotion, so as not to react so ruthlessly in the moment.

It took a lot of training and required practice. It was about naming the emotion and working with it.

It is possible. Just hand in there. We are here to support you.

In response to: I hate myself and hole I've dug

Re: I hate myself and hole I've dug

Hi Jlol I cant stick around for a chat but do just want to say that I’m really sorry you are hurting. I can emphasise with you, I have also hurt people and done a lot of things I regret, and you say you won’t do it again and it comes back . It’s hard. You are not alone.
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