does anyone wanna talk

I'm hearing you. At the same time, what's the priority?

1) You cleaning the house for it to be trashed again in a few mins tomorrow morning?

2) You having a rest so you can help Mrs Jay with the baby?

@ArraDreaming

I've had to close my eyes and walk away from the mess. I know the mess will still be there in the morning waiting.

no, it is really trashed @tyme
i only just finished in the kitchen which also had mess from last night
i feel so stressed looking around but I get what you are saying also I should calm down but I can’t stand going to bed like this

andi got work tomorrow

Trust me. I get what you are saying. I can't stand the mess the kids make. @ArraDreaming

And my sister is not the 'cleaner' type. Your kitchen bench might have stuff from last night... this kitchen bench has stuff from weeks ago. The sink is full of dirty dishes. I think I told you before, I like to wash as I go. But my sister just chucks everything into the sink, then transfers it to the dishwasher a few times a week.

This house is gross as!!!!

I'm not having a competition with you or anything... but I'm just telling you how much I'm cringing and if I didn't learn to walk away, I'd be crying - literally. It's stressing me out just thinking about it.

So know you are NOT alone. Just do the kitchen and go to bed. The other areas can wait. Otherwise when the boys wake up tomorrow, they will trash it again.

kid mess I can handle @tyme as much as at the end of the day packing up is not fun we’ll miss it when it’s gone but it’s just all the other stuff it piles up
I just can’t stand it and I can’t to go bed most nights without making everything clean for the next day even if the other half says it’s fine @tyme
I’m terffird of people judging my parenting and the state of our house and getting my kids taken away from me I literally have nightmares about it and the only way to ease my mind is to clean it all up beforei. Go bed

I would not judge other people but hard on my self @tyme and I know you aren’t comparing so thank you for just agreeing with me that’s it’s hard and not just me

I've given up @ArraDreaming . I know the kids are not going to change. I know the kids are fed and clothed.

Bottom line: don't invite people to your house unless they give you plenty of notice!!!!

I'm sorry you sit with those terrible feelings of getting your kids removed. It shouldn't be this way. I can see how much these thoughts have affected you so that you become so hard on yourself.

Give yourself a break - even if it's just for tonight. You kids are happy, clothed, warm, fed and loved. That's the main thing.

You ARE a good dad. The best dad they could have.

My fear is that at my place, if I go downstairs, I'll break my leg slipping on a kid's toy. Hence, I go back to my place, shut the door and stop thinking about the mess.

Try that - even just for tonight. It's more important you are well enough to work so you can feed your family.

Go gentle on yourself.

Thanks @tyme
Yeah watch that Lego that stuff is a killer to accidentally stand on oh and Bay Blades, I think they hurt more then Lego does. Stood on a couple of them at 4am the other night.

Thank you I really appreciate it
We will just deal with it tomorrow even though I feel like I physically can’t turn my back on it I might have to

Trust me... walking away from mess, esp the kitchen bench, absolutely GRATES against my nature. It kills me to see honey streaks on the bench, half eaten toast, crumbs, half eaten fruit.... it's terrible.. @ArraDreaming . But for my own sanity, I HAVE to walk away.

Let's just both walk away on the mess tonight....

1.....2.....3.....poof! We're gone 🙂

Walking away 🚶🏽‍♂️@tyme

I’m gonna go make a cuppa and see if mrsJay5 wants one too so I’m gonna head off and Try and leave this behind me for the day
even though like you said it’s not an easy thing to do, I will probably want to get up but need to relax

Talk soon and thanks very much
Means a lot you have been very helpful not just tobight but lots of times