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Trigger warning ⚠️ ⚠️..... So it is a lot....

Trigger warning ⚠️ ⚠️..... So it is a lot....

Hi.

So many people think they 'know' me. But they REALLY dont. Nobody actually knows me. And I'm sick of people assuming who I am, what I'm about, whats happened to me, why I do things etc etc.

Here is a bit about me.

I suffered abuse as a child, teen and adult. It has been sexual, physical, emotional and mental. 4/5 (possibly earlier) 11/12/13/14/15/16/17/18, 24, 28/29/30/31/32.....here I am at 33. They certainly are not lottery numbers. I have been dealt many unfortunate hands. I didn't ask for any of this. It has been one thing, one person after another. They have screwed with my mind time after time. I have flashbacks and nightmares. There is NO escape for me. For them, they probably go about their days peacefully, giving none of this a second thought. Their actions and words leave no scars for them, but for me, I am covered in scars. Ones you can and can't see. The mental scars are the absolute worst.

I have only ever wanted to love. Just pure, unwavering, unearned, unconditional love. It is who I am. But people and problems have made it really f*cking difficult for me to express that kind of love and you know what, it really REALLY hurts my heart. I don't have a bone in my body that 'hates'. There is only one word in this world that I 'hate' and it is actually the word 'hate'. But I unfortunately can feel myself turning from dislike to hate. When I say things like 'i hate this life', you know something must be up because of that. But over time I can physically see my world has turned from grey to black and that is a scary thing.

This life is not what I imagined. It isn't all rainbows and butterflies....it is very much the opposite, or at least in my world and experience. I have tried to believe there can be bright times and I have actually seen those days....but they have never lasted.

Anyway...I'm rambling on....but this is deep sh*t for me....

I'm having a problem because I'm actually experiencing a lot of f*cking stress. I feel like my head is about to pop off. I do a lot and the more I do, the more I realise it is not actually acknowledged or appreciated. And that hurts a lot. In fact, it is questioned and defined as 'not enough'.

I am not good enough.

Maybe it is just me, or maybe it is the things that have happened to me to cause me to be like this. I don't know and maybe I will never know.

I don't see a way out of this. I am lost. This life has become a Labrinth that has sucked me right in.

I know when times get tough, drinking perhaps isn't the answer....it certainly wasn't the other night....but to be honest, I'm beyond caring anymore. I'll do what gets me through. I don't have a drinking problem and I don't drink all day and/or everyday. But I know that when sh*t gets too much, I reach for it. And tonight is one of those nights.

Tbh, it's not the worst thing I can do rn. I've had many dark thoughts attack me in the last 20mins. A thought keeps coming to me 'just put this sh*t to rest'. I feel like I'm in this hole where there is no escape. Nobody is going to reach down and help me out. I know I have to help myself but why? So I can be treated like sh*t again? So I can put myself through the ringer and fail, again,?!? I know I'm no good.

Anyway...blah, blah, blah....Loz, stop talking....

4 replies

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In response to: Trigger warning ⚠️ ⚠️..... So it is a lot....

Re: Trigger warning ⚠️ ⚠️..... So it is a lot....

Hey @Loz_3647 - first off, thank you for sharing your story. I think it's incredibly important for all of us to tell our story - both as a cathartic practice to help vent feelings, and so that our society can become more aware of what some of us go through and how it makes us feel. It's not always easy to do so, but it is important to do so. So, kudos.

I'm hearing that you've got immense amounts of mental distress piling up, and it feels like no one is taking the time to apreciate the amount of effort you're putting in. I think that's something that people who don't have complex MH issues (or disability/chronic health issues) don't realise - that for us, it often takes 10x the amount of energy and effort to accomplish the same task. I believe it's got nothing to do with fault within us, but is about the fact that our modern social values have ingrained within them a completely unsustainable model of living. Especially for those of us who have all these extra challenges we must surmount just to get to 'normal'. So I wanted to take the time to commend you for your efforts, to tell you that you are capable and worthy - probably doubly so because you have had a much bigger hill to climb than most others.

I won't lecture you on deciding drinking is what you want to do right now - only encourage that you pace yourself, have plenty of water, and reach out for support if you need to along the way. The world is more valuable with you in it, and I hope you can see that for yourself - if not today, then one day.

💜

In response to: Re: Trigger warning ⚠️ ⚠️..... So it is a lot....

Re: Trigger warning ⚠️ ⚠️..... So it is a lot....

You are bang on with the immense mental distress. And you know what people/society want you to keep it all in and not make noise. I'm over being silenced. I'm over being shunned. I don't have the energy and don't know why I should put up with it anymore. I am actually boiling inside. Yet here I am feeling like I need to punish myself....or I don't know, maybe just put myself out of misery... because honestly I have probably never been left more lost or more hopeless.

In response to: Re: Trigger warning ⚠️ ⚠️..... So it is a lot....

Re: Trigger warning ⚠️ ⚠️..... So it is a lot....

Hey there @Loz_3647

I just wanted to check in to see how you were doing today. Here for a chat if you were around and needed one.

Sending virtual hugs,

Amber22

In response to: Trigger warning ⚠️ ⚠️..... So it is a lot....

Re: Trigger warning ⚠️ ⚠️..... So it is a lot....

@Loz_3647 I really relate to this particularily what you said about not being good enough Beleive me I deeply understand that, and Im sure many of of here do too and am also here to say that as hard as it is to believe in yourself you are more than good enough and anything thats hurt you in this life is not in any way shape or form your fault or your mistake or your doing I can also understand the feeling of wanting to reach for a drink or my case when going through trauma it was both a drink, and ciggarettes to just cope with what was happening to me at the time of imense trauma,abuse of a past relationship, we truely understand please feel free to keep posting on these forums we are here ready to keep listening to you, to take you seriously and most of all to care , you sound like a very empathetic person which is a wonderfull trait to have and can also be exhausting and I get it your doing so much for others without appreciation that you deeply need and deserve ,you deserve to be loved, listened to and cared about we are here for you without Judgement ridicule or Blame , as the Blame falls squarely on those whose words and actions cruely harmed you, it feels such a scary place where you are now and that makes me sad ,maybe theres noone else you can turn to but we are here for you please be safe

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