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Something’s not right

(not actually) Coping with things.

(not actually) Coping with things.

Urghhh. Things feel really hard at the moment.

I spent the weekend in the emergency department on forms. I was sent home when the consultant came and saw me today because there were no beds and as I hurt myself in the ED the day before couldn't guarantee my safety so there

was no point in me being there.

I cried to my psychologist when I go home as I couldn't get into the house and broke down about how I planned to end my life. I then was talked down until I saw my psychiatrist this afternoon. The plan was to get admitted but there's no beds anywhere across the city. So yet again I was sent home.

Now I'm home. I don't know what to do. There were supposed to have another carer on for me this evening but they've just been in the office all shift. I feel hopeless and overwhelmed.

My psych team told me not to go back to ed because of the strain on the ed system at the moment.

So where does that leave me. Idk. I'm safe enough for now.i think. But idk. My psychiatrist gave me some extra meds. The plan is to wait until a bed becomes available. I feel in limbo..

Maybe the chat here will help. I just want a space where I can be heard and not judged. A place to feel safety and warmth. A space where people get it.

Thanks for listening to my rant about my day. I'm exhausted.

208 replies

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In response to: (not actually) Coping with things.

Re: (not actually) Coping with things.

Hey @The-red-centaur

Oh I am so sorry that you're experiencing that. And I'm also sorry to hear you now also have the flu! You poor thing - I hope that it subsides quickly, being sick in bed is the worst.

Do you have something to distract yourself with? Maybe a book to read or a movie to watch? Something to just give your mind a bit of a rest for an hour or so?

Sitting with you,

Amber22

In response to: Re: (not actually) Coping with things.

Re: (not actually) Coping with things.

I have a zoom meeting in 5 minutes @amber22 it will keep me distracted a bit.

I don't know why I'm even bothering. I've given up.

In response to: Re: (not actually) Coping with things.

Re: (not actually) Coping with things.

The Zoom will be good to distract you for a bit. Don't focus on having to be okay forever, but just focus on the next little bit of time in front of you. So just get through the Zoom call and then you can think of something else to distract you afterwards if you would like. @The-red-centaur

In response to: Re: (not actually) Coping with things.

Re: (not actually) Coping with things.

What's the point. .

In response to: Re: (not actually) Coping with things.

Re: (not actually) Coping with things.

It's not like anyone cares. But in ready to give up...

In response to: (not actually) Coping with things.

Re: (not actually) Coping with things.

I feel like running away....no one can help me anymore.

In response to: Re: (not actually) Coping with things.

Re: (not actually) Coping with things.

I'm sorry to hear this @The-red-centaur . It sounds so tough right now.

What do you think you can do to help yourself right now?

If you do run away, what do you think you'll do? Where will you go?

Have you tried speaking to your support workers?

No need to answer on the forums. These are just points for you to consider.

In response to: Re: (not actually) Coping with things.

Re: (not actually) Coping with things.

here's my latest art...I did something a little different.

I have been feeling really intense today. Trying to keep distracted. I am tired.

In response to: Re: (not actually) Coping with things.

Re: (not actually) Coping with things.

Wow! Good on you @The-red-centaur . It's great you have been able to create this piece of artwork as a distraction. It looks incredible! Thank you for sharing. Is it oil based paints? Also, what do you do with the artwork after?

I'm sorry things have been intense for you. I hope you get to have some rest shortly.

In response to: Re: (not actually) Coping with things.

Re: (not actually) Coping with things.

@tyme thanks. It's Acrylic. I find oils too slow.

This painting is for the staff room at my house.

I tend to give away or sometimes sell my paintings.

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