Anxiety, OCD, BPD

Hi @Ocean2 ,

Welcome - back!

BPD has been my life for many years now. It can be tricky to be around people as BPD affects interpersonal relationships. Good news is, you can recover from it. Therapy such as DBT and MBT have proved to be very helpful.

Feel free to have a browse through :

Raising Awareness of BPD - Flipping the Script

Topic Tuesday// Borderline Personality Disorder Awareness Week 2022: 'See The Person'// Tues 27th September 2022 7-8:30PM AEST

Thanks for your reply.How do you live with it and what's MBT?

Do you get severe anxiety?

Thanks

Hi @Ocean2,

BPD can be tough, but it is definitely manageable, and reaching out for support is a great step!

I have BPD and anxiety and am happy to answer any questions you have 🙂

Hey @puzzlingdino 🙂

Happy to see you pop by and share 🙂

@puzzlingdino

Thanks for your reply.

I'm very confused about my BPD diagnosis. I have a mental health treating team but at the moment im having another 'unwell time' with my mental health.

It has been consuming my life.i dont know what to do. Im staying at my mums again. I usually live with partner and kids and feel terribly guilty im not there.

How do u manage yourself and when were u diagnosed?

Thanks

Hi @Ocean2,

I was diagnosed last year after many years of struggling with my mental health.

I try to have compassion for myself and to ‘give myself some slack’. I used to feel guilty or ashamed that I wasn’t able to do as much as I ‘should’ be able to, but that just made me feel worse. Accepting that I might need to do less or lower the standards I set for myself helps take some pressure off and gives me space to get better. It doesn’t mean you have any less value or are not trying hard enough!!

Changes (some made by choice, some not) to a couple of unhealthy/unhelpful factors in my life, such as my job and some relationships, put me in a place where I felt I was better able to manage my mental health. However, I recognise that not everyone will be in a position to change the circumstances affecting them.

Things also started becoming more manageable once I was able to engage in therapies and treatment that are a better fit for BPD. One-on-one therapy and group therapy have both been useful though I know not everyone has access to those, so even accessing free online resources to better understand my experiences and learn skills was beneficial to me and is something I would recommend. I can now continue to use and apply what I’ve learnt through these supports and resources and find they do help on an ongoing basis.

During tough times, I try to manage my big emotions or overwhelming thoughts by doing soothing things (listening to my favourite songs, applying pressure with a weighted blanket, smelling my favourite scent, etc.); accessing supports such as helplines, forums, chatting to friends, etc. as needed/appropriate; and journalling. I find it particularly effective when I am able to notice myself becoming dysregulated and therefore implement these things earlier on before my emotions get to a point that feels uncontrollable, and this process of intervening gets easier with practice. I do know from experience that these ‘self-care’ type things can feel like useless suggestions, and yes they won’t ‘fix’ whatever problem we’re dealing with, but they honestly do help to put us in a position where we are better able to tackle the problem.

Something else that really helps in the moment and has been one of the most important strategies for me is acknowledging and validating what I'm feeling instead of fighting it. Trying to push down those overwhelming feelings in the moment only ever made me feel worse, as I was mad at/ashamed of myself for not being able to do it, and I’d end up desperate for others to validate my emotional experiences, which ended badly. None of your thoughts or feelings are ‘wrong’, and by noticing them, acknowledging them, and being compassionate to your self in the moment for what you’re experiencing, you can live with and better manage them instead of them controlling you.

I hope some of this is helpful, and feel free to continue sharing your experience and/or asking questions if you’d like 🙂