I'm so annoyed

@lotus85 Depression is often energy thwarted. Annooyance can be an energy to get you going again. Sometimes it can be a helpful step to acknowledge the mixed upness of things. Maybe there can be a new type of grumpy dance move you can do in the bathroom when nobody is looking ... lotus are pretty cool ... they grow from muddy circumstances and bloom and blossom.

I wish I could just bloom already.

Surely I was happy or content at some stage, but it feels like a foreign concept. And I feel so ungrateful and horrible because I feel this way. Not even sure y I'm writing here. I'm at my kids concert looking around at all these ppl. 90% of them r totally normal, happy, content in their lives (mostly at least). I get noone has it perfect. But how r they where they r. How r they ok. I'm sitting here holding back tears and they r smiling and watching the kids. I'm trying to be present for my kid, (they r setting up still as I write). I know I shouldn't compare myself to others but it's so hard not to.

These r not my favourite meds... not by a long shot.

Hi @lotus85

Maybe Like them, try and focus on the kids.

Talk about that with your kids

Worth trying to shift your focus at this event

Hey @lotus85 ,

Thank you for sharing. It is true that when things happen, we are tempted to compare ourselves to those living on a bed of roses - families who seem to have it all together. Families who seem to be living the life. I am guilty of comparing myself to others too... yet it brought me into a deeper depression.

Yet it is also important to be reminded that roses have thorns. Life may 'seem' rosy for them, but is it really?

As a peer worker, I have been to homes - people who have the best cars, multi-million dollar houses, children going the most prestigious private schools... yet I can only say I would never covet them - the hidden pain and hurt some of these families go through is unimaginable (this is only my experience. I am not generalising this to everyone).

Yes, life is certainly not perfect.

Embrace what you do have, in case it passes by and you miss that too - your children, your health etc.

We are here to support you.

I acknowledge it is so hard right now. Just hold on.

Hi @lotus85 ,

I'm going through some of my open browser tabs this morning when looking for support for my own issues. I saw this one and it reminded me immediately of your post here.

https://dvassist.org.au/am-i-experiencing-domestic-violence/quizzes/am-in-an-emotionally-abusive-relationship/

I hope you're doing well.