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I left my home last Sat and now at my sons. Been here since and I do not feel any better. In fact I feel worst. I have not got off the bed for 2 days even though I keep telling myself get up and go for a walk. I'm kind of immobilized or frozen. I know I feel terrible shame constantly and feel so awkward in a new place. At my home I lived in isolation and I thought that was a big part in my major depression. I left my partner as well (we both codependent) and now I feel like I have made a wrong decision. Why the hell does depression do this to my thinking. Today I feel terribly confused, lonely and shamel. Help!
Hi @gyp. It is such a huge step to leave someone when you are co dependent and add on top of that MI issues, it feels like the weight of the world is crashing down on you. I understand the frozen feeling and depression that goes with it. I am three years on and still haven't got my life back on track. I think it is better that you have the support right now even though it would feel awkward. It will take time to adjust. I'm sure your son will understand how much your world is upside down right now. For now try not to put pressure on yourself to be better although I understand that is hard to do. Just take a day at a time and try to do the things that feel good. Take care 💜🤗
In response to: I am worried
gypSenior Contributor
Re: I am worried
Thankyou Teej. Yes I feel like that square peg in a round hole. One of the things that really irritates me is reflecting on my life and realizing how my MI has been a big part in the problems . I cant stress how important it is to get help for mental health as soon as something is out of sorts. I think that I have had depression since about 11 and never knew what it was. I never had a relationship with my mother as she was to busy focused on my alcoholic father who caused chaos in our family. I did not think my problems mattered. Now 46 years later I can see the destruction
In response to: I am worried
Unknown userMember
Re: I am worried
I'm finding a bit the same @gyp. I think I've had depression since I was about 16. Lately I've thought of all the times I struggled to get out of bed when my kids were growing up. It was not that long ago someone actually pointed out that I was depressed for most of my life. I have come to understand my family dynamic in recent times as well and how that has impacted my life. I wish you well in working through this all. Its a difficult time💜💐
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