ClockFaceSenior Contributor
Ready to throw in towel
Ive dropped mood wise really suddenly, cant say I know why. But Im ready to throw in the towel and hand everything to others. Like my sister can have all her meds, she desperately wants them and wants to fight about what meds she has and when, never happy with whats been agreed. Dad has an issue with the way I handle my money, I have an issue with it but its basically medical costs and keep getting handed a rotten deal, so Dad can have my finances and he can work it out. Mum says Im too fat so she can take over my diet and just run that show. Sister has an issue when I go to bed and get up so she can tell me when its acceptable for me to go to bed and she can wake me up. We wont take into account all the medication and bad nights I have. Ill just bow down to all the demands and decisions everyone makes for me, go to work and just exist, that way at least they will be happy, who am I kidding, I still wont be doing it right/enough and Ill still have their shit to deal with Ill just be more trained and subjicated that Ill deal with it.
This is how I feel they want it, and honestly part of me is ready to do it. Im so tired, Im tired of never being enough, not being worth being treated well, that my health is a priority, that my sister is so much worse than me that I dont count. I mean its not a competition, 2 people can just be sick or in pain. I can just be believed. Tonight its just a bit hard and I think bed is the way of it.
