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Managing thoughts of suicide & self-harm

TW Suicide

ClockFaceSenior Contributor09 May 2023, 4:28 am AEST

TW Suicide

I care for my sister who has attempted suicide twice and made a number of plans that she has admitted to part way through. Her method is medication so we all now have out medications in safes. Hers are in mine and I give her, her meds. She started stashing her night meds so Dad now does her night meds to make sure she takes them all.

We have had a few fights based on medications. When I found out about the stash I got pretty shitty. That was like a week ago. Then today she found an old script for pain meds so she went and got it filled. Then it was a bit of a thing to get the meds from her. Her thing is she is being honest about it, but mine is that it doesnt matter, the follow through does. Stop doing stupid shit. She wanted to have her night meds direct, she would take them later, not to Dad. This is like a week, maybe less than her stash. Then it was can I hold onto the Webster pack. That was a firm no.

I told her that when her Doctor or Suicide Prevention person say its ok for her to have her meds then Ill give them to her.

I dont know if I got it right, I dont know if I am getting any of it right. I didnt want the responcibility but my Dad dumped it on me. Ive not had suicude prevention training. I dont know how to handle someone who seems desperate to end their life. Having the responcibility of preventing that, managing her medications and then having to deal with all my own shit. I struggle with SI, MH issues galore, Im in severe chronic pain and other health issues. I got a heap of my own issues, enough for me to deal with and then some and then I have my sisters stuff as well.

She doesnt seem to get how much stress she is putting me under, that Im not coping and I need help. I need her to stop fighting me and do as she has been told by her team, not me.

4 replies

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In response to: TW Suicide

HistoryloverSenior Contributor09 May 2023, 6:58 am AEST

Re: TW Suicide

Forgive me if my response offends, @ClockFace, but there seems to be so much effort put into stopping your sister from taking her life, but less into helping her make her life worth living. She doesn't need to be kept busy or entertained, but she needs to find purpose.

That's the dilemma I'm in. If I had a life worth living, I would want to live it not end it.

Your family seems to be knotting itself into a tighter and tighter entanglement that none of you can find your way out of.

In response to: Re: TW Suicide

ClockFaceSenior Contributor09 May 2023, 9:53 am AEST

Re: TW Suicide

@Historylover

Your completely right, she needs a purpose a reason to live. Sadly none of us can give it to her and realistically we are all looking for the same thing for ourselves. The only thing keeping me going is that I dont want her to grow old alone. She has no one other than my parents and myself, but she is doing her best to push us all away as well.

She has a fair bit of professional help, support workers etc. Im still waiting to get into a position that people are williing to sign off on mine.

We are tying ourselves in knots. No one knows what to do. We just going from one fire to another and she keeps running around lighting more and we are running out of energy to deal with it. None of us knows what to do about any of it.

BTW no offence taken. Completetly know where you're coming from

In response to: Re: TW Suicide

HistoryloverSenior Contributor09 May 2023, 11:09 am AEST

Re: TW Suicide

Thanks, @ClockFace. I know exactly where you are coming from, too. My dilemma is so similar, and I don't know what to do about my dysfunctional family either. It's all so complicated, isn't it? I wish I could suggest something constructive, but I know you will have tried everything already, and it would be the blind leading the blind anyway. Does she have any constructive ideas?

In response to: Re: TW Suicide

ClockFaceSenior Contributor09 May 2023, 2:37 pm AEST

Re: TW Suicide

@Historylover

I dont think so, it seems suicide is her primary thought.

We got some family councilling coming up which hopefully will mean less tension in the house, or at least some direction to resolve issues. That hopefully will reduce her desire and help the rest of the house as well.

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