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Advice on BPD feelings

AloiseCat99New Contributor22 Apr 2023, 12:10 am AEST

Advice on BPD feelings

I have been diagnosed with BPD (boarder line) for close to a year now and while it has helped to understand why I am like I am and the countless mis-diagnoses of bipolar, I still feel so lost and alone. I am currently crying my eyes out wishing I could just not exist so I could have some sort of peace, I am always feeling sadness and pain, I need a break and can't seem to get one. Does anyone else just absolutely self destruct and then go about their life like and never happened? This has been my life for as long as I can remember and I just am so lost. I feel as though I'm two people in one body, there's one side that wants to just perish and destroy any good in my life and the other wants to live a full and happy life, I can't deal with the constant back and forth, how do fellow BPD people handle this or am I all alone in feeling this way too?

PSA: I've never posted on one of these before but I'm keen to get other BPD people's opinions and experiences.

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In response to: Advice on BPD feelings

EternalFlowerSenior Contributor25 Apr 2023, 9:44 pm AEST

Re: Advice on BPD feelings

I agree @BPDSurvivor @AloiseCat99

Tbh i have seen some people use their labels as a way to define themselves and thar scared me. So i was always so anti diagnosis overall. And i do believe it is hard sometimes in the public system with a diagnosis they kind of make thar out to be you and why u do anything. I had a terrible case worker once and not liking her was definitely seen as my illness and not possibly that she wasnt the right fit or that i had a valid reason to feel unsafe with her.

But it can help access services to have a diagnosis and is essential for many things. Im glad u got to access Spectrum i am told they are trying to help destigmatise bpd and give people with this diagnosis more rights in the mh system and a chance to be understood.

In response to: Re: Advice on BPD feelings

BPDSurvivorSenior Contributor27 Apr 2023, 11:04 pm AEST

Re: Advice on BPD feelings

With BPD, it has such a stinking stigma attached to it @EternalFlower . I hear what you mean by being driven to anti diagnoses.

I remember being in hospital and as soon as a nurse or doctor read BPD, I was treated totally different - I was then no longer a person, but a BPD case and I hated that. I felt people just turned their backs, rolled their eyes and walked away.

I really hope there will be more and more awareness of not only BPD but MH in general so that those suffering get the support they deserve.

Hope things get better for you @EternalFlower .

Hi @AloiseCat99 - how are you?

In response to: Advice on BPD feelings

tymeModerator16 Nov 2023, 8:22 pm AEDT

Re: Advice on BPD feelings

Hi there @AloiseCat99 ,

How are you?

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