Peer Group Chat // The Place of Perfectionism // Thursday 30th March 2023, 7-8:30PM AEDT

Perfectionism.---- ohh @amber22 my mr shaz is totally this

thanks @hanami xxxx

Totally relate @Shaz51 . As a kid I was a bit of a perfectionist. I was an A student all through primary school. When high school wasn't such a breeze for me and I started getting Bs and lower grads (still very passable tbh) I really felt it like a blow to my self-esteem.

❤️

I really felt it like a blow to my self-esteem. ---- awww very true @hanami but i am interested how you went on xx

I only did to grade 10 as my mum and aunty said i would not cope with bus travel to do grade 11 and 12

how are you now ?

mr shaz is not happy with the first attempt , he will keep going

Naw, thanks @Shaz51 . I struggled on and really loathed high school. Went back to uni as a mature age student and put much less pressure on myself. I still like things a certain way and am often hesitant to try new things as I worry I won't be good enough. But having four kids made me much less likely to aim for perfectionism. They gave me a good lesson in 'keeping it real' lol.

I still like things a certain way --- @hanami , I think this is good in many ways xx

ha ha yes children do that -- have you still got the 4 children at home ( i forgot if you have told me this before ) sorry

i am a step mum of 4 and all mine are grown up now

Doing Childcare made a big difference to me , taught me lots of things over the years

I can't remember if you've asked me @Shaz51 haha. I find myself saying that a lot these days to family - Have I told you this already....lol.

I have my youngest daughter (19) still here. Could have my son (24) return soon as he has gone back to study at uni (teaching). He is struggling to pay for rent while doing it but he really doesn't want to come back as he enjoys having his own place....so time will tell!

Hi Everyone,

Just a reminder that the next Online Peer Group Chat on The Place of Perfectionism will take place tonight from 7-8:30pm AEDT. As always, for ease of reference, times across Australia are in the graphic and listed below:

Western Australia: 4pm

Northern Territory: 5:30pm

South Australia: 6:30pm

Queensland: 6pm

New South Wales, Victoria, Australian Capital Territory & Tasmania: 7pm

Tonight, you can expect discussion about:

• What perfectionism might look like in your life and it’s impacts
• Perfectionistic tendencies and their origins
• Standards that we set for ourselves and others + expressions of perfectionism

Tagging members who have supported or otherwise interacted with the thread so far as well as those who may be interested to receive a reminder: @Shaz51 @Snowie @Appleblossom @Captain24 @Jacques @Owlunar @Birdofparadise8 @Former-Member @Bobbie @wellwellwellnez @MDT @chibam
Hope you can make it. To join us, head here, or, for those interested but unable to join live, a transcript will be made available after the event here. Feel free to continue the conversation below on this thread too 🙂

Hi Everyone,

Just a reminder that this Peer Group Chat on the topic of The Place of Perfectionism will be starting very soon, in around 20 minutes at 7PM AEDT! Tagging those who have interacted with the thread and who may be online and/or interested to receive a reminder 😊 @Shaz51 @Snowie @Captain24 @Halaxy @Birdofparadise8 @Oaktree @Former-Member @StuF @creative_writer @shradzy @Kyle1 @tisme @tashheritage22 @Bunniekins @Dahlia100

Hope you can make it. To join us, head here, or, for those interested but unable to join live, a transcript will be made available after the event here. Feel free to continue the conversation below on this thread too 🙂

As a little extra about perfectionism, something I've heard recently is about a possible link between perfectionism and impostor syndrome (more on imposter syndrome here)- the theory being that perfectionism or perfectionistic tendencies can lead to or increase feelings of impostor syndrome. I'm really curious if anyone here has any thoughts about that. @Shaz51 @hanami @FloatingFeather @tonys @amber22 @7cough9 @Jacques &/or anyone else reading along who'd like to contribute? 😊

Hi there @TideisTurning Perfectionism. O K you've got my cogs spinning again.

I suspect you have to be competitive, have goals and ambitions and a sense of pride

and purpose first, too be at risk of this affliction. My condition spares me from the above

gates that can let the, "perfectionism" horse wonder in. So I'm at a bit of a dis advantage here, but , Its home work. and keeps my hands out of the fridge. Thanks for invite.

I was never competitive. I have my farm and helped my cousin into a house without the ability to feel the things you speak of. . See , the only business I was ever any good at was, not spending. No I phones, cruises, only working holidays. nothing. But I do see how neighbours look at what I have, and feel "threatened" Am I the cause of them feeling inadequacies. Does perfectionism hold hands with feeling inadequate.

I look closely at animals. You learn a lot from them. If students were made to study animal behaviour, specially in packs, then crowded packs, It may stop them over thinking all the hundreds of mental health condition that seem so abundant in this crowded experiment we have put humans into.

Its why I believe in Quota systems for workplace and politics. I have seen what one animal can do to another. I know no one likes hearing this every time I say it,

But , we are animals, and in total ware fare , be it the work place the suburbs or the the battle field. when it comes to competition, we are capable of way worse than animals.

No wonder people feel all the pressure and threats.

Can we truly rise above our instincts, and I dont mean wear clothes and make donations.

We will see when things actually . . . really start to run out. . .

tonys moon base 1