NewUser123Casual Contributor
Recovery
Hi SANE Forum,
Eight months ago I had a prescription drug induced psychotic depressive episode.
It was really scary - a 2-3 week period of increasingly paranoid and delusional depressive thoughts, visual hallucinations, intrusive suicidal thoughts and what felt like a pretty sketchy ‘moment.’ This was a culmination of two years of significant, ongoing and permanent physical health problems, ongoing work and relationship stress. Oh yeah, double COVID and just general lockdown lyf.
I went through Austin HOPE and CAT teams at the time. And was able to set up my own psychologist during the experience. Medication for mood regulation and sleep is really good now.
The main thing I find now is that at times rumination about the experience can intrude a bit. Mainly guilt / shame that it happened. I know it wasn’t “my fault.” But it felt quite “public” to me, and, despite the fact that all my friends, family and partner were very supportive, it still feels embarrassing.
Q: How have people dealt with these sorts of feelings afterwards? How have people ‘changed their relationship’ to their similar type of experience? Is this something you have learned to ‘leave behind’ or ‘take with’ going forward?
Probably a question about forgiveness, really.
Another question I have is about recovery.
Q: How do people define the idea of “recovery” and their own? What are your measures, I suppose in the long term?
These might be a bit too philosophical, but am wondering if people define recovery by themselves “before” an event like this or before a diagnosis.
Appreciate your thoughts and time reading my story.
