Ignore complex ptsd question

Hi @Butternut , that seems very odd to me. Because our traumatic past bubbles up and affects us in a hundred ways, even while we try to push it down /ignore it.

My understanding was that it's best to work through trauma in a safe place with a psychologist, and deal with it that way. I have done that and received a lot of healing that way.

Hi @Butternut I have done this and it has made a massive difference in my life as a whole. It was not easy but working through the trauma was so re-traumatising for me that my GP stopped it after seeing me directly after one of these psych sessions. My psychiatrist also agreed it was too much and that working on ways to move forward was the way to go. I did 2 rounds of DBT and that helped immensely. It allowed me to feel when I needed to but also have things in place to get through those intense feelings so they did not continue to consume me.

It does also take a mindset that the trauma is in the past and although it has shaped us as people, it does not have to continue to consume our every thought and action. We are more than our trauma and finding the things we enjoy and the positives in our lives grow the more we allow them to overtake those negative thoughts. It does take time and practice but the more we allow those positives into our lives, the more we can also find those positives. It is in essence a re-learning and training our body and brain to focus on those positives.

Of course there will be those down days, ongoing triggers and unwanted/unhelpful thoughts but allowing ourselves to have those thoughts and acknowledging the pain/hurt can actually also help us move through them quicker. This type of approach is not one that 'forgets' the trauma rather one that allows us to put aside the time we need to deal with it, acknowledge it then move on from it. To put it into a physical perspective - we don't fight through a cold, we spend the time to rest and recover then once it has passed we get on with our lives ...so in the same way we can acknowledge the thought and feelings around our past trauma and once the intensity of those thoughts/feelings pass, we then do things to move forward ...it may be baby steps at first but all steps matter.

Hello @Butternut I have not been on the forums for quite a while but am an old hand here a few years ago.

At the time I was active here, although I had a dx of cPTSD, I really did not understand what that meant in terms of therapy and recovery. Like most people I only knew what "PTSD" it was in relation to soldiers and that flashbacks were 'reliving' bad events. I did not know, for instance then, that flashbacks in cPTSD are emotional flashbacks and getting caught in them can last hours, days, weeks or months/years.

I recently read a *book (by listening to it in audio borrowed from the library service where I live and using the free libby audio app on my phone). found it triggering but also really realised and intuitively continued even though it was not 'comfortable' it gave me deep insight into how and why I was still so mentally unwell even after 40+ years of so called 'recovery', therapy, medications etc.

I too was a person who was directed to not pursue the cPTSD therapy because it left me with active suicidal ideation every week and my GP recc to not to complete and just upped my medication. I think though often the people who recc 'putting the past aside' don't understand compulsive intrusive thoughts and/or emotional triggering, at all. I have just spent the past 5 years triggered in shame. No one knew that not even me - I thought it was 'guilt'. Until my Mum passed a year ago. Then the intensity of family interactions with the abuser and constant contact dealing with legals sent me over the top in anxiety, flashbacks and fear reactions which all culminated in a major body pain flare up landing me in the ER on New Years eve thinking i was having an actual heart attack due to the physical symptoms I was having.

What I am trying to share here is that sometimes in my lived experience, therapists are NOT equipped to help people with complex PTSD and especially using CBT and DBT - which in the end damaged me even further, pushed me further into shame and which used many of the same kinds of comments as the controlling and/or abusive family members did. Not helpful just more torture for my inner being.

So if you are a reader or listener I can recc the book as audio or paperback - as a way that helped me walk through knowledge and experience at my own pace it took me 6 months of reading/listening when I was ready - . Although not the final and only thing I will ever do - i think his lived experience and understanding of it puts him above the pack in terms of information, deep recognition and moving along.

*Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving. A guide and a map for recovering from Childhood Trauma, by Pete Walker -

Hope this helps identify if not a solution - just wishing you well. If the therapist isn't helping it is okay to find another or feedback and ask for a different approach if they can.

kind regards,
Moongal