Advice on supporting someone who's driving, or not driving.

Hey @GMelbourne !

Thanks so much for reaching out on the forums about this, I am sure that there are many members who can offer some great advice on this topic.

I personally have not cared for someone that has complex mental health, that is also driving, or unable to drive. However, I have noticed that there have been a few ads on TV and various bus stops that are introducing the 'R' plate. This is a government scheme and is for individuals who are returning to the road after experiencing a traumatic accident or incident within their lives, which might make them a bit more cautious when driving, or just so that other people on the road are a little bit nicer to them overall.

It can be really hard when someone is battling any kind of complex mental issues, but especially if they are having anxious or intrusive thoughts, it can be really daunting going on the road. I haven't looked into this new initiative too much, but I'm sure there would be some capacity to get this if the individual was suffering some complex mental health unrelated to the road (but still needed some extra support around driving).

Here is the website link to the 'R' plate that I can find: https://campaignbrief.com/mycar-launches-r-plates-to-support-drivers-returning-to-the-road-in-new-campaign-via-tbwasydney-and-eleven/

I hope some other members can give their insights too,

All the best,

Amber22

Hi @amber22 @GMelbourne

This sounds like a great idea, introducing R plate @amber22

@GMelbourne I'm a carer for someone who is currently permanently unable to drive.

I see it as another of my carers responsibilities in driving & picking him up from appointments - within limits. My boundaries are that there should be a level of gratitude, appreciation. I need to be flexible in regards to this - there are instances when he is too mentally unwell & distance/weather might mean I need to drive.

When he had his licence many years ago, he would fluctuate between being capable driver & questionable.

It's an issue that I haven't seen discussed before. There seems to be limited access for transport for mental health.

Another example is that, our local metal heath clinic has recently relocated. Previously, it was easily accessible & in walking distance. It's new location is on the other side of town to where we live. It would be about 30 mins walk. This puts extra pressure on me to drive him to his regular appointments. The other option is taxi - or walk.

What are the issues you are facing?

Thanks for highlighting this issue.

Thanks for sharing @maddison I admire how pragmatic you are, understanding that sometimes the gratitude won't be displayed and that's okay. I wonder whether the person you care for may be eligible for some extra supports/transport options as they're unable to drive, have they ever asked their clinician about this?

In my own life my friend with Bipolar regularly yo-yo'd between being a safe driver, and driving when she shouldn't. She had lost her license multiple times but is currently well and driving regularly. A family member also lives with Bipolar and will self regulate their driving when necessary, or thankfully can also seek support from family during any challenging times, but it can be a balancing act for sure.

It's an issue which can take very different forms for people living with mental health challenges and their family/carers, so the solutions or the supports required are likely also very varied. I'm trying to learn as much as I can about it!

Hello @GMelbourne

I am supporting someone ( my husband) who is regularly driving while also managing their mental health issues

As a wife , I can not drive and never have so I need to have things planned for when I need to go to the shops

@maddison , @amber22 , @Former-Member, @Former-Member

Hey @GMelbourne thanks for your support & understanding. Like all things mental health, lots of complexities.

It's a great issue to discuss & I'm glad you've noted it.

Many things are overlooked, & this is a great example of one of the many nuances involved.

Thankyou for your kind suggestion with eligibility to disability discounts. Unfortunately there are other complications that mean he doesn't meet the criteria!

I imagine it could of be a mental/psychological strain for you when you know that your friend was driving & not really safe to do so. I'm happy for you that both people in your life are going well in their recovery and safe drivers now.

Yes, my friend can experience hallucinations - I believe they have subsided over the years - he was involved in a couple of car accidents, one was quite bad. It is a pressure on me to be the driver, much better that, than the alternative 🙂

@Shaz51 hello ⭐ I'm not sure of your entire situation. I'm imagining it could be difficult to be reliant on hubby. I know in my own experience, things can be unpredictable. Maybe you really need to go to shops & he could be experiencing difficult moment & not feel like driving? On the other hand, I think it's nice that you are reliant on him to drive - it helps maintain a balance that he needs to be there for you, as you are for him. It can bring you closer? And responsibility is good💜

Hello and hugs @maddison ❤

I was born with congenital rubella syndrome which I had only one kidney, blind in one eye and totally deaf in one ear

Very true about what you said so I try to do things when it is OK with hubby xxx

@Former-Member

Hey @Shaz51 thanks for the reply 🙂 have you found that your husband is sometimes unable to drive? Or you have concerns about whether or not he should be driving? For example if his symptoms are more pronounced or after taking medication in the evening etc? I feel like lots of people develop their own system to work around these sorts of challenges but then there's always emergencies too

Very true @GMelbourne

I am lucky we live in a small country town so I can just walk down town when I need to

And I find it good thinking a head and paying bill early in case of emergencies

@maddison , @amber22 , @FloatingFeather

I agree @Shaz51 - I like to pay my bills ahead of time if possible (not that it always is).

❤️ @Shaz51 thankyou for sharing. I needed to ask Google about congenital rubella syndrome. You are beautiful inside & out ❤️