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Something’s not right

Not sure

Ugly_TroutSenior Contributor

Not sure

Hi

I've used this forum before. I've ended up with a psychiatrist who changed my meds then went on holidays. I'm so lost at the moment. I've said stuff to one friend in order to confirm my feelings of not being liked. He ended saying he's sick of my bullshit. cut ties with me. Why did I do this? I've reached out to lifeline and chatted 3 times in the last month. I'm not calling today because I don't want to waste their time. I've had suicidal thoughts for a long time now. I am not going to ct on it though. How do I chat with a device if I know that at the moment I won't do anything? I'm pretty paranoid at the moment. along with major anxiety issues. I force my self to go out but its horrendously hard. And I feel the effort isn/t worth it. It just confirms my paranoia. The way people look and act around me is just not right. I can feel them not liking me.

Any ideas anyone?

4 replies

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In response to: Not sure

JynxModerator

Re: Not sure

Hey @Ugly_Trout things sure do sound extra tough for you right now. I'm really sorry that someone treated you that way, that is so deeply unfair. I want to say something like, "someone who will cut ties with you over you seeking reassurance is not worth being friends with anyway" because that's the conclusion I have come to after losing friends in the past but... well regardless of that, it's still really painful and I just wanna acknowledge that.

In regards to helplines - you are not wasting their time I promise you! I mean some people call helplines multiple times a day - and if that means those people are getting support then it is totally worth it. And you don't have to be actively suicidal to be suffering from the suicidal thoughts, and that's still deserving of support and connection.

If you don't feel like calling lifeline again, you can always give SuicideLine (1300 651 251), Suicide Callback Service (1300 659 467), or the Samaritans (135 247) a try. The SANE drop in service (1800 187 263) is also an option, though unfortunately we're only open weekdays from 10am-10pm. But I know for a fact that we would always prefer you call more often and get the support you need, than suffer in silence. You deserve to feel heard, safe, and connected.

In response to: Not sure

Little_LeopardSenior Contributor

Re: Not sure

@Ugly_Trout You are not waisting anyone’s time on the phone. These organisations exist to support people in need. If you can not call them when you need to then they are useless. Please call them when you want to. Doesn’t matter if you do it more than once a day.

sorry you lost your fiend. That sucks. Sounds like you are in need of a a good healthcare team.

I’m not really in the loop with what services are available but maybe you can ask around here. I’m sure others here can anlso offer their advice if you ask?

In response to: Not sure

WillySenior Contributor

Re: Not sure

As others have said, you are not wasting anyone's time calling Lifeline. I have found them very good on a number of occasions. Please call them now if you haven't done so already.
Regards Willy

In response to: Re: Not sure

Ugly_TroutSenior Contributor

Re: Not sure

Hi @Jynx @Willy @Little_Leopard . Thanks for your replies. When I'm pretty sure I won't do anything to myself I just think I'm wasting their time. As deep down I know I won't do it. Life sucks for me sure, I'll get through it. Thanks for the extra numbers Jynx. I'll try them another time. Your last paragraph about the lines and don't suffer in silence bought a tear to my eyes. I am really trying, and I will do this. My inner resolve was strong enough to give up alcohol, so I'm getting through this. Although I don't know which is harder. My memories of giving up drink are lost to me.

Thanks for your support. 🙂

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SANE acknowledges the Traditional Owners of Country throughout Australia and recognises the continuing connection to lands, waters and communities. We pay our respect to Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander cultures; and to Elders past and present.

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